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Clips from Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013) - A Tale of Two Bandits (S06E06)

"♪ Doug Judy!"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"Thank you so much. You've been a great audience."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"I mean, it's a funeral. That's psychotic."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"- Why are there firefighters here?"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"Did one of them turn out to be an arsonist"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"and burn down their own bar? - Actually, yes."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"- So predictable. But why did you call me?"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"There's nothing I can do about this."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"- You have gravitas. Everyone listens to you."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"This place is a hovel."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"- But this is our bar, and it has been forever."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"about the Philharmonic adding a second piccolo."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"- It's too many. It'll muddle the sound."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"- I'm sorry I brought it up."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"- Look, we can find a new bar"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"that's not beneath us."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"if you stand in one place too long."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"- Fine. If you're not gonna do anything, then I will."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"Hank, you got to get rid of these hose humpers."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"It's them or us. - Look, guys,"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"I don't want to take sides."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"I just want to make money."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"- Then keep it a cop bar. We drink like crazy."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"on a daily basis, son."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"- Oh, yeah? We experience plenty of tragedy too."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"We lose a man a year to the pole hole."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"If it's about money, let's just have a drink-off."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"- Okay, defectives."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"My guys can handle that. - Oh, can they?"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"'Cause the Nine-Nine's about to bring the real heat."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"- Jake, are you upset? Where are you going?"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"- Hey, Jake. Man, that song was moving AF."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"We got to lay that down."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"♪ Doug Judy, he's smushing on the beach ♪"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"- Don't try and duet with me, you bastard."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"You tricked me. Now give me a hug."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"I'm so happy you're alive. I'll never forgive you."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"You're my best friend."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"Whoo, I just went through a lot of emotions real fast,"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"but I think I'm back to normal now."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"- I was thinking the exact same thing, probably 'cause..."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"both: The coffin looks like a hoagie roll."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"- Judy, what the hell is going on?"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"- Uh, who are you, and where is Rosa?"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"- I'm his boss, and I want answers."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"- The arms dealer?"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"- I got word he put a hit out on me, so I had to disappear."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"- Why does Stefano Lucas want you dead?"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"- His favorite Ferrari got stolen,"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"and for some reason he thinks I did it."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"- Probably because someone's been jacking cars"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"all over Brooklyn using your MO."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"- Oh, my God. Jake, are you saying"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"what I think you're saying? - Yes."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"You have a copycat."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"I didn't think I'd accomplished enough in my career for this."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"- I know, it's big."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"- It just feels so good to be seen, you know?"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"- Wait. The only way to catch a copycat"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"- I'm back on the force! Give me a gun."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"- Terry refuses to believe it. He thinks people can't change."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"- Doug Judy, you're under arrest."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"- What? Sarge?"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"You are really bringing down the vibe at this funeral."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"so some criminal doesn't see me in here and tell Stefano."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"- Uh, because it looks super cool, Sarge."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"We look like the hot twins from "The Matrix.""
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"- You look like Milli Vanilli. - Ooh! I call Vanilli."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"- Ah, I want to be Nilli, but you got it."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"- He's the best one. - You know it's true."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"- So did you check out Judy's alibi?"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"- Yes, and surprisingly, it checks out."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"Last Saturday night, Doug was deejaying"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"Joshy Greenbaum's bar mitzvah."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"- That was a wild party."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"Auntie Karen is a freak."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"- Judy, you deejay bar mitzvahs?"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"- Best gig I ever had. No one likes hip-hop more"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"than a 13-year-old Jewish boy."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"- Mm. So true. - I'm not buying it."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"Probably stealing cash off the gift table."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"- Sarge, come on. He has an alibi."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"Let's just team up and try and catch the copycat."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"A thousand push-ups."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"It's something Rosa and I used to say."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"It just means trust me. If Judy's a criminal,"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"I'll do a thousand push-ups, and since you're so confident,"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"- And a thousand push-ups? That's a lot to you?"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"- Obviously I can't do that much exercise,"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"but it doesn't matter, because Doug Judy is telling the truth,"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"right, Judy? - I got you, baby."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"- So fine. 100,000 push-ups."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"Great. Now, Doug... - You never call me Doug."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"- Yeah, well, you called me Jake earlier."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"I thought we were switching to first names."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"- I was thinking the same exact thing!"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"I was like, "Why not call him Jake?""
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"- We're bonding, man. - 'Cause he's so official."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"- But it's chill now."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"So, Doug... - Yes, Jake?"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"- Now that we know the copycat is using your playbook,"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"if you were still in the game-- which you're not,"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"- It's fight night at Barclays."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"with super-nice cars than boxing."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"- You got me. - That's not a thing."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"- Right. So should we just start at Barclays then?"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"- Great. But first, we got to make"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"a quick little pit stop on the way."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"- What? Where?"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"- Okay, here are the rules to the contest."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"it must be fully consumed before you order another."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"so if you throw up, you're disqualified."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"- I never throw up."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"- Guys, there's no way we can win."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"There's nine of them and six of us."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"- Five of you. I'm going home."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"Although perhaps I'll stop at Bel Vino on the way,"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"have a glass of Sancerre."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"Might even try the quince paste"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"if I'm feeling...naughty."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
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