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Clips from Fresh Off the Boat - Jessica Place (S02E02)

"And how about how Evan always takes your blanket"
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"in the middle of the night?"
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"That is selfish of him."
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"He has a million."
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"Okay, now say something you've been holding in about me."
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"I guess I think you're kind of a cheater."
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"I did. I did cheat."
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"And you know what else?"
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"if Dad had been paying attention"
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"when he's supposed to be judging our contest."
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"Who's ready for some General Tso's coleslaw?"
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"Are you a football player at a post-game press conference?"
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"Thanks, Eddie. I feel good."
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"I just can't believe Deidre would do this to me."
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"I mean, all these years, I thought she was my friend."
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"But this entire time right under my nose,"
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"she's been wearing a wig."
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"That's right. Deidre wears a wig."
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"A wig of lies."
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"You can thank Honey. She had a hunch."
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"and not know a wig when you see one."
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"Do you know how much money I have spent on olive oil?"
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"You know what?"
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"I am not covering for her anymore."
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"What do you mean?"
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"The wig isn't the only thing she's hiding."
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"Carol-Joan, the floor is yours."
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"Yes, Carol-Joan."
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"for this last-minute mystery meeting."
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"Oh, my pleasure, Deidre."
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"Oh. Let's go a little closer, shall we?"
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"What is that?"
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"Jessica, Honey."
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"- Mojito? - Mojito?"
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"- Mojito? - Mojito?"
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"Mock-ito?"
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"Mojito?"
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"Okay, this is silly. Everybody out!"
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"with the fresh mint..."
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"From Deidre's illegal herb garden!"
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"Any resident found in possession of one"
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"must be immediately expelled from the HOA."
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"Come on, girls, be reasonable."
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"I call for a new vote on old business."
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"All those in favor of cow mailboxes"
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"and above-ground pools?"
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"Yes!"
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"Oh, and Deidre wears a wig."
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"We knew that."
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"Jessica doesn't suspect a thing."
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"I don't want to get in trouble."
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"You won't."
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"Our plan worked perfectly."
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"Your mom doesn't know I planted the idea of a pool in her head,"
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"knowing it would turn Deidre against her"
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"and lead to her downfall."
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"The whole neighborhood shunning her."
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"I have to say I was surprised"
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"you wanted to take down Deidre, too."
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"I thought you were friends."
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"We power walk together, sure,"
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"but I can't be friends with someone"
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"who puts their own needs above the association."
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"Whoa! You two are pulling the strings?"
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"What an unlikely alliance."
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"Hot dog! Didn't see that one coming."
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"Yo. You really hurt Dad's feelings."
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"What are you talking about?"
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"You told him he was too old"
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"for that button-up tank top he got."
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"He really loved that thing."
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"You told me to do it."
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"I said express your frustrations,"
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"not ruin a man's life."
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"I feel terrible."
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"Emery, wait."
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"Who's that bear from "The Jungle Book"?"
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"Yeah. Baloo."
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"Deidre?"
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"How long have you been standing there?"
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"20, 30 minutes."
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"Why are you wearing a black wig?"
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"Well, since Carol-Joan told everyone I wear one,"
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"I figured, why not change things up?"
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"Deidre, accept it. You lost."
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"You're not a member of the HOA anymore"
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"and I get to keep my pool."
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"Sorry, I lost my train of thought."
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"Oh, yes."
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"Poor Jessica."
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"You have no idea."
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"It's okay, son. I know you weren't trying to."
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"Don't worry. I'm never gonna open up like that again."
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"Although I'm surprised you got so upset"
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"It's been a long time since you had one of your outbursts."
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"Oh, yeah. Because I have my jars."
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"Go on."
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"Whenever I feel angry,"
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"Like this."
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"I usually have one with me at all times,"
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"but my travel jar couldn't fit in the pocket of my swim trunks."
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"Son, I'm gonna level with you."
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"This is... strange."
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"Like, I-don't-want-to-tell- your-mother strange."
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"Let's come up with a better way to channel your energies,"
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"a way we're okay with other people knowing about."
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"Mm-hmm."
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"Yee-haw!"
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"That was fun."
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"Hey. I'm here for the pool party."
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"I brought crab dip."
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"I know."
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"I know you've both been playing me."
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"How did you find out?"
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"Here's a fun twist. Deidre told me."
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"She looked fantastic."
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"Cannot get her out of my head."
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"She told me she'd been handling the HOA rejection well,"
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"Deidre reached for some scrap paper"
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"That's when she saw it."
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