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Clips from The Mick - The Grandparents (S01E01)

"Nothing. Just, uh, meditating."
The Mick
"Oh."
The Mick
"What happened to your face?"
The Mick
"Oatmeal Boobs threw away my makeup."
The Mick
"Shut up. I was up all night dancing the Charleston."
The Mick
"The woman is awful."
The Mick
"Tell me about it. The colonel's ruining my life."
The Mick
"What are you talking about? The guy's a vegetable."
The Mick
"He is a manipulative scumbag, and he needs to be stopped."
The Mick
"Just hear me out, okay? 'Cause I know that..."
The Mick
"Oh, thank God you're here. You got to help us."
The Mick
"You left us alone with an abusive lunatic."
The Mick
"What happened to your face?"
The Mick
"- Spooky, right? - Yeah."
The Mick
"Are you gonna help us or not?"
The Mick
"Uh..."
The Mick
"Guys, Alba and I got a pretty sweet thing going on, so..."
The Mick
"Name your price."
The Mick
"Well, you are family."
The Mick
"into consideration. Ugh."
The Mick
"I'll come down to $4,200."
The Mick
"Bizarrely specific but fine."
The Mick
"Okay, just get them out of here,"
The Mick
"'cause if I have to scrub the colonel's disgusting"
The Mick
"tattooed carcass one more time, I'm gonna lose my mind."
The Mick
"Guy's got tattoos, huh? That's pretty sweet."
The Mick
"He's got a cross, a dragonfly, some weird"
The Mick
"- poem about the sea... - Hold on a second."
The Mick
"Yeah. It's big. It's right on his wrinkly tit."
The Mick
"Oh, my God."
The Mick
"for the barge-in. I'm Mickey. We spoke..."
The Mick
"- I know who you are. - You're the sister"
The Mick
"of that whore who stole my son."
The Mick
"Yeah. That's me. So, listen,"
The Mick
"but a couple things fell through on my end,"
The Mick
"so we won't be needing you anymore."
The Mick
"Sorry for the inconvenience. Hey, you know what?"
The Mick
"Grab a car on your way out."
The Mick
"Oh, I'm not going anywhere."
The Mick
"Well, that's unfortunate."
The Mick
"You leave me no choice but to reveal a scandal"
The Mick
"so very scandalous"
The Mick
"that it will shatter the foundation"
The Mick
"That's right, Colonel."
The Mick
"You've been a busy boy, haven't you?"
The Mick
"busy little boy."
The Mick
"Now, we all know the colonel is a man"
The Mick
"of many passions."
The Mick
"But none burn brighter than that of the female flesh."
The Mick
"Even he was no match"
The Mick
"for the temptresses who inhabit the tiny"
The Mick
"island nation of Guatemala!"
The Mick
"- Guatemala isn't an island. - Would you... I..."
The Mick
"- I'm doing a thing. - I know. It's just taking forever."
The Mick
"- I'm building up to something. - Build faster."
The Mick
"Could you stop interrupting me?"
The Mick
"- If you just do it... - Yeah, okay!"
The Mick
"- Thank you! - Okay."
The Mick
"Anyway..."
The Mick
"there's no denying that the colonel has done"
The Mick
"a great many things for the landlocked nation of Guatemala."
The Mick
"His legacy will forever be etched in the roads he's paved,"
The Mick
"the schools he's built,"
The Mick
"That's right."
The Mick
"The colonel is Alba's father!"
The Mick
"Why else would he have"
The Mick
"a dragonfly tattoo over his heart,"
The Mick
"if not to honor his precious libélula?"
The Mick
"Cat got your tongue?"
The Mick
"you're referring to is the B-24 Bomber."
The Mick
"Much like the one he bravely flew over the Pacific."
The Mick
"Yeah. Okay. Well, um..."
The Mick
"You're just a dimwitted gold digger"
The Mick
"trying to suckle from the mighty Pemberton teat."
The Mick
"Well, so long as I have breath in my body, you will never..."
The Mick
"Well, she did break both of her hips, you know?"
The Mick
"So, no, she's not."
The Mick
"These kids have somebody to watch them tonight?"
The Mick
"I mean, yeah,"
The Mick
"I guess I could stay,"
The Mick
"Yeah, if you're not busy."
The Mick
"Well, I am busy. I'm very busy, Chip."
The Mick
"you know, do you want me to stay?"
The Mick
"You know, I can, if you're desperate."
The Mick
"I mean, I wouldn't say that we're desperate, but..."
The Mick
"yeah, I guess,"
The Mick
"- then, yeah, - Yeah."
The Mick
"- all right. - Eh, look at that."
The Mick
"Sounds like we all need each other."
The Mick
"Who is he?"
The Mick
"I'm Jimmy. I'm the boyfriend."
The Mick
"No, he's not my boyfriend."
The Mick
"- Come on, we've been plowing for ten years. - All right, Jimmy, can we...?"
The Mick
"Come on, let's not do this right now, okay?"
The Mick
"Come here, Ben. Let's get you out of this thing"
The Mick
"before somebody else gets hurt."
The Mick
"You little murderer."
The Mick
"Where's Alba?"
The Mick
"I've called your dad's parents, and they're on their way."
The Mick
"Ugh. You're like a veal."
The Mick
"A little hustle, please. The colonel's waiting."
The Mick
"Huh?"
The Mick
"My goodness."
The Mick
"Don't worry, I got this."
The Mick
"No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no."
The Mick
"We must beg their forgiveness. Mr. Chip will give you"
The Mick
"Oh! You crushed me!"
The Mick
"Oh, uh..."
The Mick
"Oh, hey, Jimmy, hey. How's my big, sexy"
The Mick
"Well, I was eyeing the G-wagon but I didn't want to be"
The Mick
"How you doing over there?"
The Mick
"Okay, so if it's a technical issue,"
The Mick
"I was just going to make a grilled cheese."
The Mick
"and the faces of his bastard children."
The Mick
"He has a dragonfly tattoo?"
The Mick
"Get out!"
The Mick
"- What are you doing? - I'm going out."
The Mick
"Miss Mickey, when I"
The Mick
"the colonel very much."
The Mick
"You guys... Oh!"
The Mick
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