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Clips from The Brady Bunch - Mail Order Hero (S05E05)

"WHICH HE'LL BE NEXT WEEK FOR THAT EXHIBITION GAME."
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"YEAH. WHAT DO YOU THINK I OUGHT TO DO?"
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"WELL, IF YOU EVER THOUGHT ABOUT RUNNING AWAY AND JOINING A CIRCUS,"
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"NOW WOULD BE A GOOD TIME."
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"LOOK, YOU'VE ONLY GOT 2 CHOICES, BOBBY."
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"EITHER YOU TELL THE TRUTH OR YOU PRODUCE JOE NAMATH."
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"SO I THINK I'D TELL THE TRUTH BEFORE IT GETS ANY WORSE."
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"RIGHT. HONESTY IS THE BEST POLICY,"
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"ESPECIALLY WHEN NOTHIN' ELSE WORKS."
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"YEAH. I GUESS I BETTER GO PHONE THE GUYS."
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"THAT'S AWFUL."
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"NO, THAT'S AWFUL!"
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"THAT'S REALLY AWFUL."
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"LISTEN, I GOT TO GO NOW, BARBARA. BYE."
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"YOU WANNA HEAR ABOUT A BIG PROBLEM?"
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"I'VE GOT MY OWN PROBLEM."
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"THIS IS YOUR OWN PROBLEM."
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"ABOUT JOE NAMATH?"
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"YES. BARBARA'S BROTHER ERIC AND HIS FRIENDS"
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"TOLD ALL THEIR FRIENDS ABOUT HIM COMING OVER TO DINNER HERE."
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"BY THIS TIME TOMORROW, IT'LL BE ALL OVER SCHOOL."
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"I DON'T THINK IT'LL TAKE THAT LONG."
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"MY ENTIRE LIFE'S RUINED,"
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"AND I'M NOT EVEN IN HIGH SCHOOL YET."
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"WELL, HOW COULD YOU SAY A THING LIKE THAT?"
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"WELL, I JUST OPENED MY MOUTH,"
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"AND IT CAME OUT BEFORE I COULD STOP IT."
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"WE DON'T EVEN KNOW JOE NAMATH,"
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"DO WE, MIKE? NO, WE DON'T."
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"IT LOOKS LIKE YOU BENT THE TRUTH A LITTLE BIT THERE."
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"BENT IT? I MADE IT INTO A PRETZEL."
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"WELL, BOBBY, HOW DO YOU INTEND TO STRAIGHTEN IT OUT?"
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"I WAS PLANNING TO PHONE THE GUYS AND EXPLAIN."
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"WELL, NOW THAT'S A STEP IN THE RIGHT DIRECTION."
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"BUT IT'S TOO LATE. IT'S ALL OVER TOWN BY NOW."
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"WELL, BOB,"
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"I WISH I KNEW THE MAN, BUT I DON'T."
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"WELL, THANKS ANYWAY."
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"HONEY, HE HAS GOT TO LEARN"
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"MIKE."
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"HONEY,"
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"WE COULD TRY TO HELP HIM, COULDN'T WE?"
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"HOW?"
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"WELL, WHY DON'T WE INVITE JOE NAMATH TO DINNER?"
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"WELL, THAT'S AN EXCELLENT SUGGESTION WITH ONE MINOR FLAW."
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"WE DON'T KNOW THE MAN."
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"YOU COULD THINK OF SOMEBODY WHO DOES KNOW HIM."
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"WELL, LET'S SEE."
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"SAY, HOWARD COSELL KNOWS HIM."
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"THERE, YOU SEE? THERE'S YOUR ANSWER."
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"I DON'T KNOW HOWARD COSELL."
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"WELL, I DON'T!"
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"HELLO?"
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"IS THIS THE STADIUM?"
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"MAY I SPEAK TO JOE NAMATH, PLEASE?"
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"CAN I LEAVE A MESSAGE FOR HIM WHEN HE GETS IN?"
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"TELL HIM TO CALL BOBBY BRADY AT 555-6161."
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"RIGHT. IT'S VERY IMPORTANT. THANKS."
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"WHEN YOU GET TO MY HEAD, LEAVE A LITTLE PEEK HOLE,"
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"SO I CAN FIND MY WAY BACK TO THE PYRAMID."
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"ANYBODY WHO NEEDS THAT MUCH BANDAGING ISN'T WORTH SAVING."
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"THE MANUAL SAYS"
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"THAT IN CASE OF A DOUBLE COMPOUND FRACTURE IN BOTH ARMS,"
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"THE VICTIM MUST BE COMPLETELY IMMOBILIZED."
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"WILL DO ME A FAVOR THE NEXT TIME YOU ASK ME TO VOLUNTEER FOR SOMETHING?"
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"IMMOBILIZE MY BIG MOUTH BEFORE I CAN ANSWER."
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"WELL, I GOTTA GO DO MY HOMEWORK."
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"COME BACK SOON. VISITING HOURS ARE FROM 7:00 TO 9:00."
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"WELL, I'VE RUN OUT OF BANDAGES."
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"PROMISE YOU'LL STAY PUT, OK? CROSS MY HEART."
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"IF I COULD REACH IT."
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"HELLO?"
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"HELLO?"
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"HELLO?"
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"HELLO?"
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"HELLO, IS ANYBODY THERE?"
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"HELLO?"
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"HELLO?"
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"BRADY RESIDENCE."
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"UH, COULD I PLEASE SPEAK TO BOBBY?"
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"HOLD THE PHONE."
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"TELEPHONE!"
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"IS IT JOE?"
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"WHAT'RE YOU DOING DOWN THERE, ALICE?"
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"HIT-AND-RUN FLORENCE NIGHTINGALE."
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"HELLO. THIS IS BOBBY BRADY SPEAKING."
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"HELLO. THIS IS ERIC."
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"I JUST HEARD ON THE RADIO THAT JOE NAMATH GOT INTO TOWN TODAY."
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"HAS HE CALLED YOU YET?"
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"NO, BUT I GOTTA CALL IN FOR HIM."
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"BE SURE TO LET US KNOW WHEN WE GET TO MEET HIM."
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"OH, SURE. BUT LISTEN,"
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"JOE MIGHT BE TRYIN' TO CALL ME RIGHT NOW."
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"I'D BETTER GET OFF THE PHONE. BYE."
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"SEE YOU LATER, ALICE. BOBBY!"
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"HELP ME UP."
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"WELL, I DON'T THINK I CAN LIFT YOU, ALICE."
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"WELL, THEN DON'T LIFT ME, UNWRAP ME."
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"OH, CINDY, CAN I BORROW YOUR FOOT?"
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"SURE. WHICH ONE?"
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"IT DOESN'T MATTER. I'M GETTING REAL GOOD AT THIS."
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"WOW, WHAT A GUY! WHO?"
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"MIKE CONNORS. HE'S FAR OUT!"
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"LISTEN TO WHAT HE DID."
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"THERE WAS A SICK LITTLE GIRL IN THE HOSPITAL"
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"WHO WROTE TO HIM SAYING HOW MUCH SHE WANTED TO MEET HIM,"
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"AND HE WENT 1,200 MILES OUT OF HIS WAY"
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"JUST TO VISIT HER FOR 5 MINUTES."
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"JUST BECAUSE SHE WAS SICK?"
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"YEAH."
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"JUST BECAUSE SHE WAS SICK, HUH?"
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"DEAR MR. NAMATH, MY NAME IS BOBBY BRADY,"
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"AND I'M 12 YEARS OLD."
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"I'M WRITING TO YOU"
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"BECAUSE I'M VERY, VERY SICK."
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"THE ONE THING I'D LIKE"
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"MORE THAN ANYTHING IN THE WHOLE WORLD"
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"MOM, DON'T FORGET MY FIRST AID MEETING TODAY AT 3:30."
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"OH, I WON'T. I'LL... I'LL BE HAPPY TO DRIVE YOU THERE,"
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"BUT IN NO WAY AM I GONNA BE THE VICTIM."
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