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Clips from ALF - Border Song (S01E01)

So, otherwise, how was your day?

"So, otherwise, how was your day?"

ALF

Luis, let me ask you something.

"Luis, let me ask you something."

ALF

You came here when? November?

"You came here when? November?"

ALF

November 28.

"November 28."

ALF

Well, i've been here a lot longer than that,

"Well, i've been here a lot longer than that,"

ALF

You have to give the place a chance.

"You have to give the place a chance."

ALF

But i don't know anybody here.

"But i don't know anybody here."

ALF

You know me.

"You know me."

ALF

We became friends right away.

"We became friends right away."

ALF

You tried to hit me with a hoe!

"You tried to hit me with a hoe!"

ALF

All right, it was a rocky start.

"All right, it was a rocky start."

ALF

We mulched,

"We mulched,"

ALF

If i stay in riverside, will you come and visit?

"If i stay in riverside, will you come and visit?"

ALF

Once in a while and visit me.

"Once in a while and visit me."

ALF

Although, call first. I may be in the shower.

"Although, call first. I may be in the shower."

ALF

Thanks.

"Thanks."

ALF

I'm sorry, mr. Tanner. Thanks.

"I'm sorry, mr. Tanner. Thanks."

ALF

Before you go, could i ask you a big, big favor?

"Before you go, could i ask you a big, big favor?"

ALF

Sure.

"Sure."

ALF

[ Video game beeping ]

"[ Video game beeping ]"

ALF

Alf, we have to talk.

"Alf, we have to talk."

ALF

What is this?

"What is this?"

ALF

What do they do? Crash into your garage,

"What do they do? Crash into your garage,"

ALF

Eat all your food, dig up your yard?

"Eat all your food, dig up your yard?"

ALF

Yes, i am.

"Yes, i am."

ALF

Oh, yeah. Sorry.

"Oh, yeah. Sorry."

ALF

I was plowing up my garden and i hit a water main.

"I was plowing up my garden and i hit a water main."

ALF

Don't worry, it wasn't yours.

"Don't worry, it wasn't yours."

ALF

So, you're giving up gardening?

"So, you're giving up gardening?"

ALF

Not giving it up. Just switching crops.

"Not giving it up. Just switching crops."

ALF

Oh, to what?

"Oh, to what?"

ALF

Earthworms.

"Earthworms."

ALF

I can't help it.

"I can't help it."

ALF

"♪♪"

ALF

No, i don't think that's funny.

"No, i don't think that's funny."

ALF

Wait-- Is this all we've got?

"Wait-- Is this all we've got?"

ALF

What's wrong?

"What's wrong?"

ALF

[ Imitates sucking sound ]

"[ Imitates sucking sound ]"

ALF

He said, he was going to be late.

"He said, he was going to be late."

ALF

Did he say why?

"Did he say why?"

ALF

Kate, you're buying that?

"Kate, you're buying that?"

ALF

Why are you still on the phone?

"Why are you still on the phone?"

ALF

Dad! Wanna watch the game with us?

"Dad! Wanna watch the game with us?"

ALF

You can read about the game tomorrow.

"You can read about the game tomorrow."

ALF

Bird was out, mchale had a sprained ankle--

"Bird was out, mchale had a sprained ankle--"

ALF

Well, it appears that somebody missed his bus.

"Well, it appears that somebody missed his bus."

ALF

Luis, this is everybody.

"Luis, this is everybody."

ALF

I wish you wouldn't show it to people.

"I wish you wouldn't show it to people."

ALF

Where he can wash up for dinner.

"Where he can wash up for dinner."

ALF

I thought you couldn't turn left on third. It's one-Way!

"I thought you couldn't turn left on third. It's one-Way!"

ALF

Shhh! Keep it down, will ya?

"Shhh! Keep it down, will ya?"

ALF

Yo soy alf.

"Yo soy alf."

ALF

Melmac. Ka-Boom!

"Melmac. Ka-Boom!"

ALF

He's outside. Oh, no!

"He's outside. Oh, no!"

ALF

¿Qu?Piensas de mi jard??

"¿Qu?Piensas de mi jard??"

ALF

Right now it's 5:30,

"Right now it's 5:30,"

ALF

I'm going to the ladies' room.

"I'm going to the ladies' room."

ALF

- Pick up line 1. - I-- I can't take any calls.

"- Pick up line 1. - I-- I can't take any calls."

ALF

He what?

"He what?"

ALF

Weeds. Mala hierba.

"Weeds. Mala hierba."

ALF

Hey, hey! Hold it, hold it--

"Hey, hey! Hold it, hold it--"

ALF

We've been waiting to hear.

"We've been waiting to hear."

ALF

You didn't find him, did you?

"You didn't find him, did you?"

ALF

Luis. Come here.

"Luis. Come here."

ALF

Luis--

"Luis--"

ALF

This is my job, you know.

"This is my job, you know."

ALF

Come on, luis. Let's go for a little--

"Come on, luis. Let's go for a little--"

ALF

And i'm still getting used to it.

"And i'm still getting used to it."

ALF

But we tilled together,

"But we tilled together,"

ALF

There's no reason why you can't drop by here...

"There's no reason why you can't drop by here..."

ALF

No problema.

"No problema."

ALF

Just a second.

"Just a second."

ALF

Easy shot! Hah!

"Easy shot! Hah!"

ALF

Copyrighted by alien productions. All rights reserved.

"Copyrighted by alien productions. All rights reserved."

ALF

I truly hate to compromise your high moral position,

"I truly hate to compromise your high moral position,"

ALF

Use butter, like everybody else.

"Use butter, like everybody else."

ALF

This is-- Lynn!

"This is-- Lynn!"

ALF

He saw your school picture on my desk.

"He saw your school picture on my desk."

ALF

No! He'll make me stay!

"No! He'll make me stay!"

ALF

But you ruined everything!

"But you ruined everything!"

ALF

Luis, your father's here.

"Luis, your father's here."

ALF

Ms. Wine, i'm sorry this is taking so long,

"Ms. Wine, i'm sorry this is taking so long,"

ALF

[ Slurp ]

"[ Slurp ]"

ALF

I sort of got on the freeway,

"I sort of got on the freeway,"

ALF

Seems your mexican kid missed his bus yesterday.

"Seems your mexican kid missed his bus yesterday."

ALF

He doesn't speak any english...

"He doesn't speak any english..."

ALF

Are chihuahuas fast?

"Are chihuahuas fast?"

ALF

Yes. My friends are there,

"Yes. My friends are there,"

ALF

Well, maybe.

"Well, maybe."

ALF

Something tells me that nobody knows he's here, do they?

"Something tells me that nobody knows he's here, do they?"

ALF

Yo pens?Que eras bob barker.

"Yo pens?Que eras bob barker."

ALF

Told you i'd take the rap.

"Told you i'd take the rap."

ALF

Hasta la vista.

"Hasta la vista."

ALF

You're in a mood.

"You're in a mood."

ALF

Listen! Do you hear voices?

"Listen! Do you hear voices?"

ALF

Will you take some zucchini, please?

"Will you take some zucchini, please?"

ALF

Hello? You don't know me.

"Hello? You don't know me."

ALF

But if you think this boy doesn't deserve our help--

"But if you think this boy doesn't deserve our help--"

ALF

You ruined it, i almost got to go home on a bus,

"You ruined it, i almost got to go home on a bus,"

ALF

What's the matter with it?

"What's the matter with it?"

ALF

Weeds. Mala hierba.

"Weeds. Mala hierba."

ALF

Probably not. But, hey!

"Probably not. But, hey!"

ALF

You have? Great!

"You have? Great!"

ALF

I didn't plant zucchini.

"I didn't plant zucchini."

ALF

Yes, i did.

"Yes, i did."

ALF

I've got his son here. Yes, i'll hold.

"I've got his son here. Yes, i'll hold."

ALF

Not exactly.

"Not exactly."

ALF

We hoed, we sprinkled--

"We hoed, we sprinkled--"

ALF

It's corn!

"It's corn!"

ALF

- Brian-- - A-L-F.

"- Brian-- - A-L-F."

ALF

My crops aren't doing very well.

"My crops aren't doing very well."

ALF

I don't want to abandon him,

"I don't want to abandon him,"

ALF

[ Ring ]

"[ Ring ]"

ALF

Come on, willie. He's not going to listen to you.

"Come on, willie. He's not going to listen to you."

ALF

Honey, you don't look anything like the village idiot.

"Honey, you don't look anything like the village idiot."

ALF

Great. Dust bowl '87.

"Great. Dust bowl '87."

ALF

Die, scurvy dog!

"Die, scurvy dog!"

ALF

Isn't there some government program...

"Isn't there some government program..."

ALF

Well, assuming you take some when you go away to college--

"Well, assuming you take some when you go away to college--"

ALF

I think we should let luis answer that question.

"I think we should let luis answer that question."

ALF

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