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Clips from The Cleveland Show - A Cleveland Brown Christmas (S01E01)

"Look, Cleveland, it seems pretty clear that Rallo feels hurt."
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"And he's just displacing his anger onto Santa and Christmas."
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"The only gift he could possibly want would be to see his father."
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"The most human among us is a bear."
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"Let that sink in."
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"I gotta go find Rallo's dad."
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"Merry Christmas."
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"Cleveland Jr., you're very lucky to have a father."
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"Tonight, I'm gonna do my best to make sure that Rallo has a father on Christmas."
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"But it's gonna be a dangerous mission and I might not make it back."
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"- No, Daddy, don't go. - Shh-shh-shh."
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"You've been a good boy this year."
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"I try, Daddy."
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"Proud of you."
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"And I bet Santa's gonna bring you some nice gifts."
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"- I hope so. - Mm-hm."
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"I'm so lucky to have a son like you."
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"You're creeping me out a little, Dad."
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"Oh, I'm sorry."
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"Seems like just yesterday you were standing up in your crib..."
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"...shaking on the sides..."
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"...like you couldn't wait to bust out of there and explore the world."
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"Now look at you."
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"All fat, can't play baseball worth a pile of dog crap..."
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"...still writing letters to Santa Claus at 14..."
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"...laying back, taking it while your dad strokes your face."
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"What's wrong with you? What kind of kid have I raised?"
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"Okay. Now I'm gonna go find Rallo and Roberta's dad."
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"You are not going out at midnight on Christmas Eve."
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"Ah."
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"Cleveland, nobody's been able to track Robert down for months."
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"Why don't you just be a normal stepdad, buy his love, and move on?"
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"His father."
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"What the hell?"
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"Just hear those sleigh bells jingling"
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"Ring-ting-tingling too"
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"Come on, it's lovely weather For a sleigh ride together with you"
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"And friends are calling yoo-hoo"
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"Giddyup, giddyup, giddyup Let's go"
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"Giddyup, giddyup, giddyup It's grand just holding your hand"
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"Whoo-hoo! Ha, ha, yeah."
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"All right, yeah, swallow that."
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"Yoo-hoo. Everybody decent?"
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"Doughboy? What the El DeBarge are you doing here?"
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"I need to talk to you about your son."
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"Ma'am, I think I saw the Atlanta Hawks out there."
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"And it's ruined Christmas for him."
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"So? The Beach Boys' Brian Wilson..."
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"...his dad made him take a crockie in a cardboard box..."
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"...under the Christmas tree in front the entire family."
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"What the hell?"
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"Well, if so, Brian Wilson defecated in that cardboard box..."
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"Just like all boys love their fathers no matter how bad they treat them."
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"So I'm gonna dress up like Santa..."
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"...and bring you to our house as my gift to Rallo."
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"And if you won't do it..."
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"...you're not worth the box Brian Wilson dropped a little deuce coupe in."
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"Look, Robert..."
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"Don't hang your homonyms on me, doughboy."
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"Merry Christmas, whore."
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"Here, baby. Look what's under the tree."
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"- Ha. A Slinky. - What's wrong?"
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"That child's a stranger to me now."
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"Ho-ho-ho."
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"You got some gigantic jingle bells, showing your face around here."
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"Santa."
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"You're 14 years old."
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"Rallo, Santa wanted to apologize for what he said at Mr. Waterman's party."
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"So he went out and got you the Christmas tree you really wanted."
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"He brought you a picture of the guy who played Grady on Sanford and Son."
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"Whitman Mayo. Yes. I needed him."
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"Thanks, Santa Claus."
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"Ohh."
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"Merry Christmas, peoples."
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"What the...? - Oh, my word."
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"Some type of warlock has cursed Christmas."
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"What's going on around here?"
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"Maybe this will clear things up."
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"- How are you doing, Rolo? - Oh, I'm so happy to see you."
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"Last night, I realized it's important for me to see my sperms on Christmas."
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"- What's up, Rwanda? - Merry Christmas, Dad."
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"Kind of butchered it, but whatever."
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"Look, Rocko, I'm sorry I lied about being an FBI agent."
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"It was a lowdown, dirty move."
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"Wow, you actually got through to him."
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"Of course, I did. It's my damn show."
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"But why, Dad?"
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"Why would you lie to your own kid?"
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"I guess I didn't want you to know the truth about me."
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"But now it's time I told you everything."
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"No more lying."
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"The truth is..."
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"...Santa Claus. - What? You're Santa Claus?"
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"See, I live at the North Pole, so that's why I can't visit that much."
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"Oh, that's why you guys lied."
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"So I wouldn't know Santa's true identity."
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"Exactly."
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"And so your mama can't garnish Santa's wages."
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"But we gotta keep this a secret just between us."
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"But wait. If you're Santa Claus, then who's this clown?"
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"Cleveland? Oh, well, that's about right."
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"Dad, there you are."
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"Did you know that Rallo and Roberta's dad is Santa Claus?"
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"You're a good boy."
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"Merry Christmas."
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"So this all makes sense to you, Rallo?"
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"Hell, yeah. My dad's Santa Claus."
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"Oh, the weather outside is frightful"
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"But the fire is so delightful"
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"And since we've no place to go"
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"Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow"
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"Ho, ho. A black Santa Claus."
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"Yes. I can't imagine how that feels."
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"- What? - Your dad's a bum."
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"They say it's cheaper than flying."
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"You're a waste of a life, fat man. Time to end it all."
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"...because he loved his father."
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"You sit back down."
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"I sent those."
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"Here you go, Holt."
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