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Clips from Family Guy - New Kidney in Town (S09E09)

"who will be reading his essay to introduce the President."
Family Guy
"I sat down with accomplished wordsmith Chris Griffin."
Family Guy
""Hope is a horizon we head for, leaving nothing behind us but fear. ""
Family Guy
"Chris, tell me how those words came to you."
Family Guy
"Do you believe in angels, Tom?"
Family Guy
"Of course I do."
Family Guy
"-Well, there you go. -I suspected angels."
Family Guy
"-lt was angels. - Very good."
Family Guy
"Chris Griffin, a wea ver of dreams at the loom of the mind."
Family Guy
"A neat thing I just said. And now sports."
Family Guy
"Oh, Chris, we are so proud of you."
Family Guy
"Mom, I wrote that! He stole it, and he's taking all the credit!"
Family Guy
"Chris, is that true?"
Family Guy
"You didn't write anything! This is my essay!"
Family Guy
"No, he's Iying!"
Family Guy
"That should be me getting to meet the President!"
Family Guy
"Meg, for God's sake, relax."
Family Guy
"You're not the first person to be outshined by a sibling."
Family Guy
"What about the third Brontë sister?"
Family Guy
"Oh, Emily, Wuthering Heights was truly splendid."
Family Guy
"Oh, no, Charlotte, Jane Eyre was so very brilliant."
Family Guy
"I made blood out me Iady parts!"
Family Guy
"It's happening now."
Family Guy
"-Ah. It's a period joke. -It's a period period joke."
Family Guy
"Okay, moving on."
Family Guy
"Oh, my God!"
Family Guy
"I want to watch this, but I got stupid dialysis at 3:00."
Family Guy
"I am so sick of this crap mucking up my Iife."
Family Guy
"Well, Peter, I mean, what, you can get away with"
Family Guy
"skipping one treatment, right?"
Family Guy
"Yeah, it's probably just Iike missing an antibiotic."
Family Guy
"You just take the next one."
Family Guy
"Yeah, you're probably right. Besides, it's Charles in Charge."
Family Guy
"JOE: You know what I Iike?"
Family Guy
"The "Charles" part is formal, but the "In Charge" part is kind of casual."
Family Guy
"QUAGMIRE: Oh, wow. Remember this?"
Family Guy
"QUAGMIRE: Geez, how many "A's" does that guy need?"
Family Guy
"JOE: Two, apparently."
Family Guy
"QUAGMIRE: You know, it's kind of weird that '80s white clothes"
Family Guy
"could pass for '90s black clothes."
Family Guy
"QUAGMIRE: Ah! Nicole Eggert."
Family Guy
"JOE: Didn't she bang somebody gross? QUAGMIRE: I don't know."
Family Guy
"JOE: Yeah, I feel Iike she banged somebody gross."
Family Guy
"on this show was 200 grand."
Family Guy
"Oh, my God! Peter, you don't Iook so good."
Family Guy
"Dr. Hartman, this was just too close a call."
Family Guy
"Suppose he's stuck somewhere, or... Or he's trapped in an elevator"
Family Guy
"Well, as I said, Mrs. Griffin, he's on a Iist, but there are a Iot of people ahead of him."
Family Guy
"Well, what are the chances of getting him moved up the Iist?"
Family Guy
"Honestly, not great. It could be months before he can get a transplant."
Family Guy
"and would be willing to donate one of theirs."
Family Guy
"I'II do it. He could have one of my kidneys."
Family Guy
"Well, we always check spouse records for compatibility."
Family Guy
"But it turns out you are a match for a Iittle girl"
Family Guy
"Oh, well, how 'bout we concentrate on this family, Doctor?"
Family Guy
"Well, the only other option is your children."
Family Guy
"No, I won't put the kids through that."
Family Guy
"You'II just have to roll the dice and hope a kidney comes through soon."
Family Guy
"Well, what about me?"
Family Guy
"Is that possible, Doctor?"
Family Guy
"Well, I suppose."
Family Guy
"Stranger things have happened in medicine."
Family Guy
"that was incredibly hostile and ended up escaping from the Iab."
Family Guy
"Okay, Doc, we got to have a talk at some point,"
Family Guy
"but Brian, are... Are you... Are you sure about this?"
Family Guy
"Well, there's no harm in seeing if I'm compatible."
Family Guy
"Well, according to these results, Brian is a match."
Family Guy
"(ALL CHEERING)"
Family Guy
"Hooray, yay, yeah, ice cream sounds great."
Family Guy
"Mrs. Griffin, could I speak with you and Brian alone, please?"
Family Guy
"Well, of course."
Family Guy
"-Kids, why don't you wait in the car? -Okay, Mom."
Family Guy
"Let's go find the big, black sassy nurse. There's always one."
Family Guy
"WOMAN: You can cry about it, or you can decide to Iive."
Family Guy
"-It's your choice. -STEWIE: Found her."
Family Guy
"Hey, what is it, Doc?"
Family Guy
"Well, as a dog, Brian's kidneys are smaller"
Family Guy
"and don't have the capacity of a human kidney."
Family Guy
"For the procedure to work, we would need to transplant two."
Family Guy
"But... But I only have two."
Family Guy
"That's right. The procedure would kill you."
Family Guy
"My God, Dr. Hartman, isn't there any other way?"
Family Guy
"I'm afraid not, Mrs. Griffin."
Family Guy
"BRIAN: I'II do it."
Family Guy
"What?"
Family Guy
"Peter, you're my best friend."
Family Guy
"You... You gave me a home when I didn't have one."
Family Guy
"And you've treated me Iike a family member ever since."
Family Guy
"I wouldn't be here if it wasn't for you."
Family Guy
"And I... I wanna... I wanna return the favor."
Family Guy
"After all, I'm... I'm a dog. I have another eight years, at best."
Family Guy
"I'm... I'm willing to give that up so you can have another 40."
Family Guy
"Brian, I... I... I don't know what to say."
Family Guy
"Well, you saved mine."
Family Guy
"Yeah. We..."
Family Guy
"We sure did, buddy."
Family Guy
"Hello, everyone. Lois, did you put Stewie to bed?"
Family Guy
"Yeah, he's asleep."
Family Guy
"Good. I'd rather he didn't know about this till it's over."
Family Guy
"He's just a baby."
Family Guy
"Now, since the operation is tomorrow, I thought it might be"
Family Guy
"a good idea to just kind of close the book, you know?"
Family Guy
"So I just wanted to share my final thoughts"
Family Guy
"with each one of you."
Family Guy
"Meg, you're so beautiful on the inside,"
Family Guy
"but it's very important that you know your Iimitations."
Family Guy
"What do you mean?"
Family Guy
"Well, I know they say "Reach for the stars," but if we all did that,"
Family Guy
"there'd be nobody Ieft here on Earth, right?"
Family Guy
"I guess."
Family Guy
"(CHUCKLES) There you go."
Family Guy
"Chris, I have watched you grow from a Iittle boy"
Family Guy
"into the young man you are today."
Family Guy
"I know sometimes Iife seems tough,"
Family Guy
"but you just remember to reach for the stars."
Family Guy
"I know you can, slugger!"
Family Guy
"And, Lois, I only ask this"
Family Guy
"because of the dire situation I'm in, but can I..."
Family Guy
"Can I hump your Ieg for 15 uninterrupted seconds?"
Family Guy
"I suppose so, Brian."
Family Guy
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