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Clips from South Park - Royal Pudding (S15E15)

"as nationwide suicides abound."
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"A massive candlelight vigil was held last night,"
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"* And it seems to me *"
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"* You lived your life *"
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"The Prince of Canada has said that-"
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"We have just received breaking news"
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"that the Canadian government now knows"
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"who took the princess."
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"The Canadian prime minister is instructing"
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"all people of Canadian decent"
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"Box of faith? What the fuck is that?"
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"Hello, there, my noble, strong fellow Canadian."
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"If you are watching this filmstrip,"
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"then no doubt, Canada is in grave danger."
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"is the royal family."
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"If you have been ordered to open your box of faith,"
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"then one or more of the royal family must be in peril,"
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"or else you just opened your box of faith"
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"and are watching this without being told to,"
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"in which case, you are a dick."
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"If you have indeed been instructed to open the box,"
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"All Canadians in fighting condition"
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"are asked to meet by the tree in Edmonton."
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"In your box of faith,"
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"you will find all the items you need:"
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"A location beacon, a first aid kit,"
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"and a sandwich."
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"You may eat the sandwich now."
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"Good luck, Canadian citizen, and God help."
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"All of Canada is relying on you."
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"Where are you going?"
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"I got to get to Canada"
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"and... - and join the armies"
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"and bibbidy bobbidy boo is Y,"
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"Bibbidy bobbidy boo, X plus Y equals Y."
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"X equals zero. The song is badly written."
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"Second verse, X plus Y"
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"equals bibbidy bobbidy cubed plus the boo."
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"Do you mind telling me where your brother is?"
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"I don't know."
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"How am I supposed to do a play, mkay,"
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"teaching students about the importance"
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"We have two more days of tech,"
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"and then previews start on Monday."
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"Getting rid of Tooth Decay"
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"is what I'm trying to fuckin' do!"
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"He's your brother, Kyle Broflovski, mkay!"
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"How are you going to fix this?"
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"Of course you're going to Canada."
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"You're Canadian, sure enough."
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"They can't take our princess and get away with it!"
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"Soon as I heard the call, there was no question"
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"I was gonna sign up."
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"Didn't care how far away I was;"
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"I was gonna get to that rally point at the tree in Edmonton."
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"Didn't know other Canadians living here in the U.S."
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"I'm from Toronto originally, but everywhere I went,"
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"They just think I look Canadian."
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"The name's Ugly Bob."
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"* So white and so strong *"
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"* I am a toothbrush *"
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"* Together we work *"
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"* With candy and treats- *"
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"Hold it! Hold it! Stop!"
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"What the fuck was that?"
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"The audience is supposed to feel scared"
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"of Tooth Decay, Kyle, mkay?"
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"If Tooth Decay has no believability,"
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"have nothing to play against!"
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"I'm trying, Mr. Mackey; I really am."
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"Oh, you're tryin'?"
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"and lazily blurting out your lines"
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"This play is supposed to change how people think, Kyle!"
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"Just pick it up from there."
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"Brave Canadians!"
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"The princess has been kidnapped,"
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"Ooh, the giant! The giant, that's not good."
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"with a bowl of Kraft Dinner."
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"When the giant arrives,"
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"our swords, our-"
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"I smell Kraft Dinner."
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"- It's the giant! - Scott!"
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"You fart-loving tricksters!"
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"You're a dick, Scott!"
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"You have always been a dick."
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"and so then that turned me into a dick!"
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"And then I got radiation poisoning in Ottawa,"
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"I'm also the biggest Canadian patriot of all of you."
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"Well, at least we tried."
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"I guess the princess is gone for good, eh?"
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"- Who? - The Native Canadians!"
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"The Native Canadians?"
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"Goddamn Native Canadians."
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"Think they run the world."
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"Fart-loving Eskimos."
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"I'm sure they've taken the princess."
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"Loudmouth, self-centered assholes."
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"Let's get 'em! Let's fuck 'em up!"
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"like I'm some kind of Eskimo racist."
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"Before the noble white man arrived,"
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"Canada was populated with these snow monkeys."
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"Who else would be pissed of enough at Canada"
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"to kidnap our royalty?"
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"Okay, in 15 fuckin' minutes,"
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"you all are not gonna care about this anymore,"
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"so I'll just say what I need to say."
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"We are two days away from opening,"
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"and you're all fuckin' around!"
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"- Yeah! - It's all Tooth Decay's fault."
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"Let me tell you something, Dental Floss."
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"You're already acting like you're a star,"
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"and we haven't even opened yet!"
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"Open your fuckin' eyes, Dental Floss."
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"You're about to blow your shot!"
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"who has the princess."
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"who preys upon people of all nationalities!"
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"but we will have to destroy it!"
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"I don't know what the goddamn problem is."
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"Maybe you all don't know how serious tooth decay is."
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"Maybe you all just don't give a fuck."
South Park
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