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Clips from Bob's Burgers - Friends with Burger-fits (S05E05)

"Downstairs, I think. Mike, what are you doing?"
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"I thought you were with Teddy."
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"Oh, that's not good. Why?"
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"You haven't heard of the Belt Buckle Belly Buster?"
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"You're gonna get destroyed."
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"so shut your mouth."
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"Yeah!"
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"Maybe I did, maybe I didn't."
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"Uh, this is a chain, pal. I'm Kevin. I'm the manager."
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"Look, Teddy is... Well..."
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"so order up!"
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"Please take the burger back to the kitchen, ma'am."
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"This is just fantastic."
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"Oh, yeah? Well, I can get tough, too."
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"Oh, yeah? Well, I hope you got trained to get your ass kicked!"
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"Thanks for coming!"
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"Are you okay, Bobby?"
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"Before you pass out, that's the nicest thing anyone's ever done for me."
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"I have so much glass in myself. I'll get you out of here, buddy."
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"No, Bob. Let's go home."
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"I really appreciate what you did."
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"Look, I-I'm sorry I said you're not my best friend."
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"Because you are. I am?"
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"Yeah, I mean, it depends on how you define it."
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"Eventually I... Enough. Can I carry you across the threshold?"
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"Aw, my little beat-up Bobby."
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"How 'bout some smelling salts? Oh, God. Come on!"
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"♪ Your best friend! ♪"
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"I hope you didn't need this jar."
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"We're getting into canning."
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"What are you gonna can?"
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"Farts. Oh!"
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"When you need one, you don't have one."
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"Wash it when you're done!"
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"It'll be all that's left"
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"Hey, let's go down and see"
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"if we can make the walk-in cold enough to make fartcicles."
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"Guess who just went to the doctor"
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"for his five-year checkup? Kirstie Alley."
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"Me. Longest I've been naked in three years."
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"Well, what'd he say?"
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"You know, "Your cholesterol is off the charts.""
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""You absolutely must change your eating habits, or you will die.""
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"Maybe you should be a little concerned, right?"
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"You eat a burger pretty much every day."
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"Not every day. Yeah. We order off-menu."
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"It's how we have fun, right?"
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"Kill me."
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"Ha-ha, that's nice."
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"Let's take a look at Teddy's heart, shall we?"
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"Oh, hey... hey, that tickles!"
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"What are you doing?"
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"Oh, but I'm not, Bob. You are."
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"Mmm! Keep 'em coming, Bob."
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"No! Keep 'em coming!"
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"It's gonna pop! It's gonna blow!"
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"I'm sorry, Teddy!"
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"What? What happened? What-what happened?"
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"I'm killing Teddy."
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"What? You're gonna kill Teddy?"
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"Guess I could home-school the kids 'cause..."
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"Oh. Gotcha."
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"What? I'm just being supportive. Good night."
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"Lowering the temperature a few degrees really works."
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"I should have worn my higher socks."
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"Just disappoint-sicles."
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"Aah! Stupid patch of ice!"
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"Sorry, you're not stupid. You're just slippery."
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"Hold on."
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"And tomorrow, the walk-in goes from stinky to rinky."
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"Remember when he ate that receipt?"
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"Well, I hope you're right."
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"This tastes kind of funny."
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"It tastes burger-ish, but not good."
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"It's a... Veggie burger."
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"It's a what? A veggie burger?!"
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"Listen... Agh! Ugh!"
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"Why? Oh! Teddy..."
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"Now I can't get the taste out of my mouth."
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"Ugh! Look, I can't in good conscience"
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"serve you a burger every day."
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"I don't see you shoving a veggie burger down Mort's throat,"
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"and he eats a burger every day."
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"What?! You do? Soup?!"
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"Take it easy, Teddy."
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"you eat a burger every day?"
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"You eat a lot of burgers, Mike, the mailman!"
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"Yeah, but I walk nine miles a day. Look at my calves."
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"I'll-I'll make you soup or salad,"
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"but I don't think I can serve you my burgers anymore."
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"You cutting me off, Bobby?"
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"I guess I am."
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"You're cutting me off?!"
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"Is this some kind of sick joke?!"
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"I think it's for your own good."
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"You stay the hell out of this, Mort!"
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"What? Huh? I'm sorry!"
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"I'll kill you! Give me a burger!"
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"Teddy! Calm... down."
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"You calm down!"
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"I don't want to be alive. I don't want to be alive!"
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"Fire! There's a fire. Fire!"
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"No, Lin, it's the alarm clock."
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"What? Snooze it."
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"Someone unplug the alarm clock!"
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"Where are you going so early?"
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"I told Teddy I'd go jogging with him."
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"Why are you running if you don't want to?"
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"Wait. Who's your best friend then?"
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"Mm... probably Walter Russo."
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"Walter Russo?!"
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"When was the last time you talked to Walter Russo?"
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"I don't know, like, six years ago."
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"There's a big difference."
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"of Formica that's between us."
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"Are you talking about your dingdong, Daddy? Brag."
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"so his heart doesn't explode."
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"Oh, our little seal platform."
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"What is that?"
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"My alarm clock. Got to go."
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