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Clips from The Office - Chair Model (S04E04)

"I bet that you have a bunch of very liberal girl-type friends"
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"who trust you implicitly,"
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"because they know you'd never touch 'em because of your condition."
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"I have a friend who's single. Oh."
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"Sandy."
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"She's gorgeous, and she's got a feisty personality, too."
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"Catcher or infield?"
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"I don't know, Michael."
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"Is she a dress-wearer or a pants-wearer?"
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"I think I'm being very clear what I'm asking."
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"It bothers me that you're not answering the question."
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"What is wrong with these people? I would do anything for them,"
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"and they're just hanging me out to dry."
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"but it is, and you know why? Because nobody here is willing to help me."
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"I don't think that this is... Now, okay,"
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"I know that this is probably not appropriate."
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"But I need help."
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"Because I want to play ball with my kids before I get too old."
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"And I don't wanna hear, "I don't know, I can't help...""
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"No, no. I am a catch, and I am not going to be"
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"So this is what we're going to do."
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"Dwight is going to hand out index cards, and I want you all to write down the name"
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"Well, look, I have an assigned parking place in front, so..."
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"Help us out. Wish I could, but I can't."
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"Well, can, but won't."
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"Michael, please..."
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"What part of "shorn't" don't you understand, Kevin?"
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"Look, I could probably handle it, yes, but..."
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"Listen! Don't forget to fill out those cards. My love cards."
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"There's nobody I hate enough to write her name on this card."
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"Well, I'm setting Michael up with my fat friend, anyway."
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"Oh, you don't know her."
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"Okay, Wendy."
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"Hot and juicy redhead."
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"(PHONE RINGING)"
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"Hello, Wendy."
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"This is Kevin's friend, Michael."
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"This isn't Wendy."
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"I'm sorry. Could you put her on, please?"
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"Dude, this is a Wendy's restaurant."
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"Damn it, Kevin. Okay..."
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"Um..."
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"Could I just have a Frosty and a baked potato, please?"
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"You have to come to the restaurant to order food."
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"Well, I'll send somebody to pick it up, just have it ready."
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"It's ready now."
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"Well, put it aside."
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"Um..."
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"I've collected the rest of the ladies."
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"Good, good."
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"I wrote that."
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"That sounds good. Go get her."
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"Wait! Wait! Wait! Wait! Wait!"
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"First, go to Wendy's, get my food, come back, and then go."
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"Thank you, thank you very much. This is just what I needed."
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"The furniture company gave me the name of the advertising agency."
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"They gave me the name of the photographer."
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"The photographer, a Spaniard, used a Wilkes-Barre modeling agency."
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"The agency gave me the following information."
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"Deborah Shoshlefski, 142 South Windsor Lane."
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"As dead as every dead animal who has ever died."
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"Try not to be so hurtful, Jim."
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"Okay, Michael, you know what? I might have someone for you."
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"Oh, really? What's her name? Burger King?"
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"PAM: No, I mean it."
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"She's really nice and sweet and you guys might actually get along."
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"I don't think I'm ready. Is she hot?"
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"I'm setting Michael up with my landlady. She's really sweet, and..."
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"No question about it, I am ready to get hurt again."
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"We need to assemble the Five Families."
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"No, not the Five Families."
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"We have to!"
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"The Five Families are the five companies of Scranton Business Park."
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"There's Michael Scott, Regional Manager, Dunder Mifflin."
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"W.B. Jones of W.B. Jones Heating and Air."
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"I'm trying to get a date with Pam's hot friend."
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"And she needs to meet me right now."
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"I'm calling the meeting anyway."
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"Our suspect has straight brown hair. She is wearing blue jeans and a black top."
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"So..."
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"Behold our bachelorette."
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"Hello, my lady."
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"Uh..."
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"Is who Michael what?"
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"I'm sorry. I'm supposed to be meeting someone named Michael."
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"That's not... Yeah, I'm not... Michael?"
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"Michael?"
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"So you"
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"What happens next? What..."
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"You're asking me what I do with the checks that people write to me?"
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"Just making conversation."
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"All I want is somebody nice, and sweet,"
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"and someone I can talk to and share an experience with, you know?"
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"Why is it so hard for people like us?"
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"I don't know."
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"This is going to blow your mind. Look at that!"
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"And you can't see her whole body, down here, she has a boob job."
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"Just..."
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"She was just crazy smart and really manipulative, and..."
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"JAN: (ON PHONE) Michael? Hello, Michael?"
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"Oh, okay."
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"It was very nice."
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"It was like talking to the sweet, old lady on the bus."
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"That's incredibly rude."
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"Where's Scott?"
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"Michael Scott could not make it today due to an unforeseen prior engagement."
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"Let's just meet back in an hour."
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"Gentlemen, please."
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"(STAMMERING) I have things."
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"All right, what do you want?"
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"We want our parking spaces back."
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"Whose parking spaces?"
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"and some people have to park really far away"
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"and walk all the way to the office."
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"And some people sweat too much for comfort, and..."
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"I don't have time for this, guys. Just give them back their spaces."
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"Okay. We good? Okay."
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"Could've done this over e-mail."
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"Margaret the landlady? Really, Pam? Is that what you think of me?"
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"She's sweet and cute. I thought you would get along."
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