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Clips from Shameless - Swipe, Fuck, Leave (S07E07)

"Is that Ariel's boyfriend?"
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"- I'm taking a break. - This is why you need Tinder."
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"Yeah, because you chopped it all off."
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"Excuse me?"
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"God!"
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"I'm gonna need you to do the laundry,"
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"And when the 72 hours and one second is over,"
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"I'm gonna loosen your belt,"
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"I'm gay, all right?"
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"Whee!"
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"Oh, and this one."
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"- Hey, Olga? - Yeah?"
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"Uh, a change of clothes. You guys look great."
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"and did 30 days in rehab, so..."
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"Oh, I found it in the park, I'm gonna sell it."
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"Santos called in sick again."
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"There's a grocery list on the bulletin board."
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"- I'm gay. - So am I!"
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"So now this inexperienced vagina-fucker"
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"Oh!"
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"and I won't have you deported?"
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"Come back tomorrow at noon for training."
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"I'd say yes."
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"Okay. Oh, yeah. Thank you."
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"Then don't talk to them. Just swipe, fuck, leave."
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"and here's your tennis racket."
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"I work at Patsy's. I wanted to let Chad know..."
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"unlike the bad influences he's had up to this point."
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"I got too busy, but we had a great day."
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"can climb up on the couch all by herself?"
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"- Let's just... - Okay."
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"The topless maid that I hired was more of an escort..."
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"Place is in a financial shitstorm."
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"than some dude."
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"worldly or some shit?"
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"Oh, my God, I'm not a maid. Why are you two riding my ass?"
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"Then we're a perfect match."
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"Hey, Bruce Jenner was the dude, so fuck you guys."
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"I think these girls just invited me"
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"Not if you're gay, it's not. It's disgusting."
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"That obvious?"
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"Black coffee, extra hot, splash of 2%."
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"Like I said in the ad, at the store, it's 2,500,"
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"Where is that, uh, environmental impact study"
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"I'd rather have my girlfriend sleeping with other chicks"
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"- Uh-huh. - Thanks."
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"Still not mad at Frank, huh?"
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"Eh, what the hell?"
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"Gonna compare vagina stories?"
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"My services are à la carte. Pick what you like."
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"When did you become such a baby?"
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"Or maybe that's me."
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"You're drunk."
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"Let's make things a little easier for us this time, Harry."
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"I like what's going on here,"
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"Yeah."
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"What the fuck?"
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"Harry!"
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"All right, follow me, I'll show you around."
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"that watching Ted Cruz on CSPAN"
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"Ooh. Having a rebound thing with Frank?"
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"No, um, but last senior intern just got a job"
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"Work looks good, gentlemen."
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"Please tell me she has a dick."
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"confronted Caleb about that chick."
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"- Liam, come on. - Okay."
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"Open the damn door!"
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"Uh, stop it! It just gives me the willies"
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"Aw, you made me toast."
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"- I am not exposing my legs. - Oh, come on."
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"And you're telling me you've never done that before?"
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"but Sherrie wanted it for her birthday."
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"Hey!"
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"Open the door."
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"- Who? - The owners, Phillip."
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"I'll call Fitz, tell him we need it ASAP."
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"burnt half the building down."
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"Yeah, of course there's a plan."
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"clean the floors, vacuum, and dust the furniture."
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"Sound good? Okay!"
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"I learned I'm not an alcoholic."
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"That's fine. Do whatever you want."
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"Told him to meet me at the loft after work."
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"You're the weirdo, all right? Not me."
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"What are you drinking?"
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"Have a shot. It'll make you feel sexier."
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"That's so sweet."
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"Kitchen is yours, too."
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"Yeah, well, uh, I just got expelled from college"
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"- No fucking way! - Eh, you can't just take him, Frank."
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"Dom won't go down on me 'cause I'm not circumcised."
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"you called your uterus better start looking"
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"- He okay? - Uh, new heated floors."
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"How come you didn't come home last night"
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"Hey, bring Lip, too."
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"Whoa."
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"Aah!"
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"- Come on. Liam, let's go. - What?"
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"wears a new pair of socks every day, throws out the old ones."
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"But I liked it."
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"Got a plan?"
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"- Let's get you a picture. - I don't know."
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"Uh, he's gonna help me find something... a tech startup."
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"He doesn't like to take the goggles off."
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"Gonna wake up the damn babies."
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"You already have three matches."
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"Because I didn't want you freaking out"
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"- I'll give you a boost. - Okay."
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"I'm losing money."
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"Where is my vacuum cleaner?"
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"Yeah, nailed the door shut from the inside."
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"Come on, help me bring his crap downstairs."
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"No."
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"Yeah."
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"then take off your pants..."
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"But you can get started with the coffee and the tea."
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"Pick three guys with a strong physique"
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"Frank fucking Gallagher."
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"- Ugh. - Maureen Wilson."
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"Sweet, thanks."
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