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Clips from Mork & Mindy - My Dad Can't Beat Up Anybody (S04E04)

- I don't have any pockets. - Ah. Good.

"- I don't have any pockets. - Ah. Good."

Mork & Mindy

Then you get to collect all the cash.

"Then you get to collect all the cash."

Mork & Mindy

Oh, my pleasure, sir. Lovely seven and three-quarters.

"Oh, my pleasure, sir. Lovely seven and three-quarters."

Mork & Mindy

- Donations are greatly appreciated. - Dad, Dad, I plead with you.

"- Donations are greatly appreciated. - Dad, Dad, I plead with you."

Mork & Mindy

Don't do this. That cap is filthy. You don't know where it's been.

"Don't do this. That cap is filthy. You don't know where it's been."

Mork & Mindy

Besides, the money you're taking from these guys, I'm sure...

"Besides, the money you're taking from these guys, I'm sure..."

Mork & Mindy

Son, now, please, son, please.

"Son, now, please, son, please."

Mork & Mindy

and the surgeon general has determined

"and the surgeon general has determined"

Mork & Mindy

bullets can be hazardous to your health. Now, please.

"bullets can be hazardous to your health. Now, please."

Mork & Mindy

I'm not Superman... Thank you very much.

"I'm not Superman... Thank you very much."

Mork & Mindy

- And even if I was, I wouldn't want to see you or these people hurt.

"- And even if I was, I wouldn't want to see you or these people hurt."

Mork & Mindy

Now, son, please, please. I'm not a coward.

"Now, son, please, please. I'm not a coward."

Mork & Mindy

Hey! Who said you could move?

"Hey! Who said you could move?"

Mork & Mindy

He was just helping me, that's all.

"He was just helping me, that's all."

Mork & Mindy

Shut up! I told you, empty the pockets.

"Shut up! I told you, empty the pockets."

Mork & Mindy

All I have is a frog in my right pocket.

"All I have is a frog in my right pocket."

Mork & Mindy

Please, he's telling you the truth, Charlie. Oh, I'm a nonviolent person.

"Please, he's telling you the truth, Charlie. Oh, I'm a nonviolent person."

Mork & Mindy

Here, take your money and go. Leave us all alone.

"Here, take your money and go. Leave us all alone."

Mork & Mindy

- I told you, empty the pockets. - Hey. Stop that. I'm warning you.

"- I told you, empty the pockets. - Hey. Stop that. I'm warning you."

Mork & Mindy

- Ow! - Nobody, nobody, hurts my family.

"- Ow! - Nobody, nobody, hurts my family."

Mork & Mindy

[THUNDER CRASHING]

"[THUNDER CRASHING]"

Mork & Mindy

What's doing this?

"What's doing this?"

Mork & Mindy

Daddy, what happened?

"Daddy, what happened?"

Mork & Mindy

We'll just hope it never happens again.

"We'll just hope it never happens again."

Mork & Mindy

Come on, you're safe now. Let's go home.

"Come on, you're safe now. Let's go home."

Mork & Mindy

You know something?

"You know something?"

Mork & Mindy

They said Chicago was the Windy City.

"They said Chicago was the Windy City."

Mork & Mindy

Then the newspaper reported that a freak tornado

"Then the newspaper reported that a freak tornado"

Mork & Mindy

I mean, I didn't know I had that kind of rage inside of me.

"I mean, I didn't know I had that kind of rage inside of me."

Mork & Mindy

I'm afraid of what'll happen the next time I open a pistachio and there's no nut.

"I'm afraid of what'll happen the next time I open a pistachio and there's no nut."

Mork & Mindy

But I only wanted his respect and put him in a dangerous situation.

"But I only wanted his respect and put him in a dangerous situation."

Mork & Mindy

I know. You did take it too far,

"I know. You did take it too far,"

Mork & Mindy

but it's normal to want respect from Mearth.

"but it's normal to want respect from Mearth."

Mork & Mindy

Oh, Mearth. Mearth, I missed you. I was gone for two days.

"Oh, Mearth. Mearth, I missed you. I was gone for two days."

Mork & Mindy

You, I know, I know, I know.

"You, I know, I know, I know."

Mork & Mindy

Gosh, you know, while you were gone,

"Gosh, you know, while you were gone,"

Mork & Mindy

- how brave Daddy was. - I heard.

"- how brave Daddy was. - I heard."

Mork & Mindy

He took a gun away from a criminal. He did, he did.

"He took a gun away from a criminal. He did, he did."

Mork & Mindy

And he didn't even muss his hair during the tornado.

"And he didn't even muss his hair during the tornado."

Mork & Mindy

See, Mork? You've been searching for something you had all along.

"See, Mork? You've been searching for something you had all along."

Mork & Mindy

- You really mean it, son? - Of course I do.

"- You really mean it, son? - Of course I do."

Mork & Mindy

You're everything to me.

"You're everything to me."

Mork & Mindy

We're together all day long.

"We're together all day long."

Mork & Mindy

Oh. Mearth, I mean, what about Superman?

"Oh. Mearth, I mean, what about Superman?"

Mork & Mindy

He's a joke.

"He's a joke."

Mork & Mindy

He's a fake. He's fictitious.

"He's a fake. He's fictitious."

Mork & Mindy

Mearth, why don't you tell Daddy who your new hero is?

"Mearth, why don't you tell Daddy who your new hero is?"

Mork & Mindy

Oh, come on, Mind, he doesn't have to, really.

"Oh, come on, Mind, he doesn't have to, really."

Mork & Mindy

I will. It's the governor.

"I will. It's the governor."

Mork & Mindy

I got that from you, Dad. That's your sense of humor.

"I got that from you, Dad. That's your sense of humor."

Mork & Mindy

[ALL LAUGHING]

"[ALL LAUGHING]"

Mork & Mindy

Mork calling Orson. Come in, Orson.

"Mork calling Orson. Come in, Orson."

Mork & Mindy

Mork calling Orson. Come in, Orson.

"Mork calling Orson. Come in, Orson."

Mork & Mindy

[VACUUM CLEANER HUMMING]

"[VACUUM CLEANER HUMMING]"

Mork & Mindy

WOMAN: Hola.

"WOMAN: Hola."

Mork & Mindy

Oh, excuse me, Ola.

"Oh, excuse me, Ola."

Mork & Mindy

I must have the wrong mind.

"I must have the wrong mind."

Mork & Mindy

I'm looking for Orson.

"I'm looking for Orson."

Mork & Mindy

WOMAN: Orson no in casa. This is his housekeeper, Keezbalita.

"WOMAN: Orson no in casa. This is his housekeeper, Keezbalita."

Mork & Mindy

Keezbalita, could you turn off the vacuum?

"Keezbalita, could you turn off the vacuum?"

Mork & Mindy

[VACUUM POWERS DOWN]

"[VACUUM POWERS DOWN]"

Mork & Mindy

Oh, thank you. That's much better. But where's Orson?

"Oh, thank you. That's much better. But where's Orson?"

Mork & Mindy

He's no in casa.

"He's no in casa."

Mork & Mindy

I can take a message.

"I can take a message."

Mork & Mindy

[SPEAKS IN SPANISH]

"[SPEAKS IN SPANISH]"

Mork & Mindy

Well, will you tell him, please, that Mork called,

"Well, will you tell him, please, that Mork called,"

Mork & Mindy

that fathers put too much pressure on themselves

"that fathers put too much pressure on themselves"

Mork & Mindy

to be the apple of their child's eye?

"to be the apple of their child's eye?"

Mork & Mindy

not what they think that they should be.

"not what they think that they should be."

Mork & Mindy

- Did you get that? - You bet.

"- Did you get that? - You bet."

Mork & Mindy

I tell Orson Monty called. Na-no.

"I tell Orson Monty called. Na-no."

Mork & Mindy

I work five hours on a report,

"I work five hours on a report,"

Mork & Mindy

and somebody named Monty gets all the credit.

"and somebody named Monty gets all the credit."

Mork & Mindy

[SINGING IN SPANISH]

"[SINGING IN SPANISH]"

Mork & Mindy

Boy, I wish I could stay here with you and your daddy and have macaroni.

"Boy, I wish I could stay here with you and your daddy and have macaroni."

Mork & Mindy

and you scored highly on the IQ test.

"and you scored highly on the IQ test."

Mork & Mindy

Huh. All right, as the world turns, let's play hide-and-seek.

"Huh. All right, as the world turns, let's play hide-and-seek."

Mork & Mindy

What the hell is going on here?

"What the hell is going on here?"

Mork & Mindy

touched down in a small bar.

"touched down in a small bar."

Mork & Mindy

I mean, you play with me, you read to me, we watch TV together.

"I mean, you play with me, you read to me, we watch TV together."

Mork & Mindy

Thank you.

"Thank you."

Mork & Mindy

and that this week I learned

"and that this week I learned"

Mork & Mindy

Daddy, you're so great.

"Daddy, you're so great."

Mork & Mindy

Oh!

"Oh!"

Mork & Mindy

And what is one suitcase packed and ready to go?

"And what is one suitcase packed and ready to go?"

Mork & Mindy

who had too many items.

"who had too many items."

Mork & Mindy

Well, I once stopped a lady in the express line

"Well, I once stopped a lady in the express line"

Mork & Mindy

Let's check out the jukebox

"Let's check out the jukebox"

Mork & Mindy

I don't know, son.

"I don't know, son."

Mork & Mindy

Well, Mork, you were protecting Mearth.

"Well, Mork, you were protecting Mearth."

Mork & Mindy

It was really scary, Mind.

"It was really scary, Mind."

Mork & Mindy