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Clips from Gilligan's Island - The Matchmaker (S01E01)

"Here we are."
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"I'm gonna tell you children the secret."
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"This is sort of a celebration."
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"Twenty years ago tonight"
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"Mr. Howell proposed to me and I accepted."
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"Aw, how beautifully romantic."
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"Thurston always had a knack for romance."
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"He took me to the most enchanting little restaurant"
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"The Tour d'Argent."
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"Do you remember, sweetheart?"
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"Well, how could I forget a prime bid of income property"
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"on West 47th Street."
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"- It was on 52nd street, dear. - No, no, dear."
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"West 47th Street and we had pate de foie gras."
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"Uh, Thurston, dear, we were having pheasant under glass."
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"His memory isn't quite what it was."
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"Yes, well, of course, what difference does it make?"
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"Anyhow, here's to 20 years of wedded bliss."
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"Bad year."
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"Here's to the most devoted"
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"considerate husband in the world."
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"Here, I'll drink to that."
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"Here's to Lovey who looks as lovely tonight"
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"as she did 20 years ago."
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"May I say, 20 years ago what a vision of loveliness"
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"she was sitting there in a flaming red dress."
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"Flaming red dress? I never had a red dress in my life!"
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"You must have rented it"
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"because that's what you had on that night."
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"Thurston, you must be remembering somebody else."
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"No. I can see her in that red dress"
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"sitting there, clicking her nails."
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"Clicking my nails?"
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"Yes, it's a nervous habit she has, clicking her nails."
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"Oh, shall we make another toast?"
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"Yeah. Here is to 20 years of harmony and bliss."
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"If I click my nails, it's only to drown"
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"out the noise of his sniffing."
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"- I beg your pardon? - I said, "sniffing.""
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"Twenty years of it!"
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"Well, I hadn't known it bothered you before."
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"It doesn't, not nearly so much as his throat clearing."
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"[clearing throat]"
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"Just as I never spoke of your snoring."
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"My snoring?"
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"- How dare you say such a thing. - It took nerve."
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"Mr. Howell and Mrs. Howell.."
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"Oh, what vulgarity!"
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"But what I can expect of man"
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"who doesn't know the difference between"
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"his oyster fork and a shrimp fork?"
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"That's gone far enough."
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"I won't go any farther"
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"because I shall never speak to you again."
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"As long as we have witnesses, you mind putting it in writing."
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"Here's to a perfect marriage."
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"I heard there's a popular saying for who has had it."
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"I want you gentlemen to clear space for me"
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"and I'll list my simple requirement."
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"First of all, tea at seven. Gilligan, you're caddy."
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"Skipper, I want you to rinse out and wash that luggage."
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"That beast of a man can go where he chooses."
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"I'm not staying alone. Be a darling, help me."
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"I left my hair dryer outside."
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"Well, here we are, one big happy family"
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"having our happy midday meal."
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"Yes, it certainly is a beautiful day, isn't it?"
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"It's a lovely day."
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"Don't you think so, Mrs. Howell?"
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"Might I have the coconut milk please?"
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"[coughing]"
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"I don't think I could be heard over the noise"
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"at the far end of the table"
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"'Ginger, would you please pass the coconut milk?'"
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"Sure."
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"Gilligan, would you ask the lady who sits there"
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"clicking like a parking meter if she's through with the salt?"
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"Your husband for 20 years would like you to pass the salt."
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"Tell that gentlemen with the nasal disturbance"
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"that I have not finished."
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"Why don't you two stop this foolishness?"
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"Yes, your disagreement really has no basis, you know."
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"What's a few insults when you've been married for 20 years?"
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"Besides whether they even were insults is highly debatable."
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"Are you kidding? He said that she snored."
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"You can hardly call that an insult, could you?"
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"Well, I would."
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"Don't you think that's a bit immature?"
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"No, I think it's an insult."
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"Perhaps that proves my point."
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"Well, aren't we the smart one?"
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"I needn't take that tone of voice."
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"Frankly, I don't blame her a bit."
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"Excuse me, I'm gonna finish my meal elsewhere."
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"All this is because Mr. Howell can't remember anything?"
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"I can remember everything."
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"Be quiet, Gilligan. You're just making things worse."
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"Don't blame him, after all it was you who started it."
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"- Says who? - Says me."
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"- Well, say it to yourself. - I certainly will."
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"Gilligan, come with me."
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"I haven't finished."
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"Gilligan, come with me."
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"I'm finished."
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"Gilligan, we've got a red light emergency"
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"and we've got to nip it right in the bud, right now."
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"- Or nobody will be talking. - Exactly."
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"How did it all start?"
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"Let's see, the Professor said to Ginger, "I'd like to--""
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"No, I mean with the Howells. How did it start?"
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"Mrs. Howell asked Mr. Howell for the coconut milk and--"
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"I know this is hard for you"
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"but do you remember clear back to last night?"
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"- Can you do that? - I'll do my best."
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"- Morale of the group is on you. - Aye aye, sir."
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"What were the Howells doing when they started their fight?"
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"They were showing Mary Ann and me how happy they were."
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"- No, no, no. - Yes, yes, yes."
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"Because they were celebrating the anniversary"
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"of Mr. Howell's proposal to Mrs. Howell in the Tour d'Argent"
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