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Clips from The Big Bang Theory - The Convergence Convergence (S09E09)

"Then I graciously accept."
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"I was kind of hoping you would."
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"Hey, good news, I just got off the phone with my mother."
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"She is coming to the wedding."
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"Okay, wait,"
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"you're inviting people to our wedding?"
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"Yeah, I've already asked"
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"Stephen Hawking and Robert Downey Jr."
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"And now, don't get your hopes up, 'cause he's pretty busy,"
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"Seriously?"
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"He invented the Rubik's Cube."
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"Okay, fine,"
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"but why would you invite him to our wedding?"
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"Because, despite his fame and fortune,"
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"of you to go to all this trouble for Leonard's mother."
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"Yeah, I'm also doing it for Leonard."
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"I think this could really help their relationship."
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"How dare you invite your father without consulting me!"
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"You do understand our marriage ended because he had an affair."
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"I know,"
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"and there's no excuse for that."
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"and hadn't shown him any physical affection for years."
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"You sure?"
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"the quantum vortex apparatus is now controlling the orientation."
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"You're right."
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"You realize what this means?"
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"I do."
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"Hey,"
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""We request a meeting at your earliest convenience"
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""regarding your quantum guidance system,"
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"That's weird."
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"Is there a window around here we don't know about?"
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"I'm sure it's just a coincidence."
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"Yeah, of course."
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"Oh, you're welcome."
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"Okay, Mary."
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"I take care of him."
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"Sure you do."
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"Oh, well, the usual gang."
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"Yeah, and Leonard's mother's already here."
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"You've met her, right?"
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"not a vampire."
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"Well, thank you so much for asking."
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"I've been well, and you?"
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"Don't be."
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"All right."
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"take over the whole project."
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"And you know what happens if we object?"
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"Like every American Idol winner since season four."
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"Come on, Howard, you're overreacting."
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"Am I?"
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"Am I?"
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"That chess club picture is now"
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"is in charge of acquisitions."
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"a lot of money for your invention."
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"No, I was just thinking about Jurassic World."
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"Boy, that was terrible."
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"Oh, we have to use the stairs."
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"When are they gonna fix your elevator?"
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"Uh... I don't-- any day now."
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"Maybe I'll have a heart attack and not have to see her."
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"with you and Mom,"
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"Me, too."
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"Penny's really looking forward to seeing you."
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"Ah, she's a sweetie."
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"You got a good one there, Leonard."
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"Hey, we're here."
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"Alfred!"
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"Well, happy to be here."
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"Dr. Hofstadter."
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"A pleasure. Hi."
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"Hello, my hateful shrew."
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"Hello to you, you wrinkled old bastard."
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"All right, now I'm starting to sense a little tension."
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"Can you please not ruin it?"
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"Oh, look at that-- you can apologize."
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"Mom! I'm sorry."
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"We have a reservation at the best restaurant in town."
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"It only got three-and-a-half stars on Yelp."
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"Sheldon! I'm not sorry. That's true."
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"I don't know what to do."
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"It's the Air Force."
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"I mean, should I respond to their e-mail?"
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"Ignore it?"
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"You can't ignore it."
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"It's not that postcard that says it's time"
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"to go back to the dentist."
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"Guys, come on."
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"We're meeting everyone for dinner."
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"Oh, dude."
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"The minute you opened that e-mail,"
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"they knew you got it."
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"I love America."
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"Oh, if it's even the U.S. military."
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"I also love the enemies of America."
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"Penny, I hope the example of my failed marriage"
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"to Leonard's father doesn't discourage you"
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"from the commitment you've made to one another."
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"Oh, of course not."
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"Mom, please save something for the toast."
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"So, Alfred, what is it that you do for a living?"
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"I study ancient peoples and cultures."
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"Don't laugh-- she wasn't joking."
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"Play with your phone."
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"Well, on that note,"
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"there are many cultures that have an apocalyptic flood"
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"I have the unerring Word of God."
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"But that's very interesting."
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"Oh."
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"Actually, I admire it."
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"Really? Yes."
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"but I have prayed, many times, to God,"
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"to turn my wife into a pillar of salt."
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"They're probably the ones who leaked it"
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"to the military in the first place."
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"You know, "Four on Your Side"?"
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"I'm being harassed by the government,"
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"not trying to get to the bottom of a dog-walking scam."
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"You know what's really happening?"
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"All the movies you've watched,"
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