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Clips from Brooklyn Nine-Nine - Mr. Santiago (S04E04)

"Hey, Mr. Santiago."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"I am Jake Peralta, Amy's boyfriend."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- You too. - Ah, look at that."
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"You're a Garamond man, huh?"
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"Of course, what other font would I use, Cambria?"
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"Amy said you were a crack up, but I had no idea."
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"Excuse me? Shall we?"
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"- Let me get your bag. - Sure."
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"The two hunks have arrived."
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"So glad to have you here, Dad."
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"- How was your flight? - Oh, good, good, you know,"
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"- I did "The Times" crossword. - Oh, great puzzle to do, right?"
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"- Oh, my God, 17 down? - Oh, I know,"
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"- what about 16 across? - What about 34 across?"
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"What about 20 across?"
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"- I also did it. - Yeah."
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"So Jake and I had a great conversation on the way here."
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"You didn't tell me he was so interested in mutual funds."
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"Uh..."
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"talk about allocation, asset mix, attribution analysis."
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"These are just terms I throw around all the time."
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"In alphabetical order."
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"Well, that's just how my brain works."
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"in random order? What are you, crazy?"
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"He's got a point. I like this guy."
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"Oh! Captain Holt."
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"This is my dad."
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"Captain, heard a lot about you."
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"Oh, certainly. There you go."
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"Thank you."
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"Yeah, pretty big night:"
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"the three most important men in your life under one roof."
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"Oh. Burn on Holt... probably."
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"That's the one you were talking about."
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"The Cairn Terrier is intelligent and inquisitive"
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"with a bold personality."
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""A bold personality.""
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"We know what that's code for:"
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"you're the bitch."
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"Pimento is back. How's the dog show going?"
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"Well, it's not without its drama."
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"blowing his brains out."
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"Yeah, yeah, yeah, how's that Wire Fox Terrier?"
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"- Still in the lead? - In the lead?"
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"- I doubt she even wins her group. - What?"
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"Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, don't say that!"
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"What? She's not gonna win?"
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"Ooh, I bet the check you gave me on the Wire Fox Terrier to win."
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"That money was to help you get a PI license."
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"Yeah, but I wanted to pay you back fast."
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"You made it sound like the terrier was a sure thing."
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"You said she was majestic."
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"They're all majestic."
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"This is a nationally-televised dog show."
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"Listen, mister, I didn't give you that money"
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"so you could throw it away. I want it back."
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"We're gonna pay your bookie a visit."
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"- What? - And so help me God,"
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"you better hope I don't miss the "in memoriam.""
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"If it's dead dogs you wanna see,"
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"I know where to get my hands on dozens of them."
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"All right, choo-choo!"
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"Here comes the veggie train, leaving the station."
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"Next stop, a healthy body."
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"Terry has kids. Just carrots for me."
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"Oh, that's funny. Me too."
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"Really? Get out of town."
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"Even though everybody says..."
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"I'm gonna go get a refill. Do you want something?"
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"Oh, uh, you know, if they have it,"
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"maybe, like, a dry Riesling?"
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"- Excellent choice. - Thank you."
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"They definitely have it. I brought it."
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"Wow, you are really pulling this off."
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"I know, all this research is actually gonna work."
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"Should I prepare for things all the time?"
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"- Yeah. - Nah, that's crazy."
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"Look, I can't believe you memorized"
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"that whole, huge binder."
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"and hid it out on the stoop."
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"So do you have a favorite watchmaker?"
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"I do, but I actually have to run to the bathroom real quick."
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"Watches..."
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"it would be NOMOS Glashutte."
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"It's a German company based in Saxony."
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"Speaking of which, I think I just dropped"
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"a bit of a Glashutte in the baño."
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"Steer clear."
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"The only downside is, I've told him I have to pee"
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"so much he thinks I have a UTI."
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"I wonder if he's ever had a UTI."
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"You know what, I'm gonna sneak outside"
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"and get the 411 on the UTI. BRB."
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"He loves abbreviations."
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"Hey, Jake. You looking for this?"
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"What? Oh, no."
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"Boyle, your turkey's here."
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"Pretty cool, huh?"
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"I feel like Dexter. I think."
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"I never actually saw the show."
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"Billboard gave me nightmares."
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"Charles, are you crazy?"
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"No, I don't want to watch a living animal die"
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"and then consume its flesh."
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"that's been killed in a factory?"
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"Because I don't have to see that."
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"Gina, I know it seems cruel, but it's a swift death."
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"One painless chop removes the head."
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"I mean, that doesn't sound so bad."
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"And then its decapitated corpse only flops around"
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"for, like, half an hour."
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"go through with this if I give this little guy a name."
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"He's now Nikolaj."
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"That's my son's name."
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"Sorry, Gina, but we need a turkey,"
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"and you're the only one complaining."
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"I don't like it either. It's not a fair fight."
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"Give the bird a gun, then see what happens."
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"Yeah, but eating a big drumstick on Thanksgiving"
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"Wait, you assume Hitchcock and I want to eat that turkey?"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
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