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Clips from Friends - The One with Christmas in Tulsa (S09E09)

"l'm sorry l won't be here."
Friends
"l was checking out that insurance company's Christmas party on three."
Friends
"...and that a little Christmas bonus may be in order."
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"Well, that's like money in your pocket."
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"Being here sucks. This work sucks!"
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"...on a very questionable bedspread."
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"So here's a very special holiday song..."
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"...that l wrote for some very important people to me."
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"l can save you time, ladies. l'm right here."
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"-We have a live one! -lt's a Macy's bag!"
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"Wiper blades. l don't even have a car."
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"What are you doing here, Santa?"
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"Santa, the armadillo and l will have a talk in the kitchen."
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"...so l borrowed one from a guy at work."
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"-Yeah, is that okay? -Did your dad ever dress up like Santa?"
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"-You're not gonna go? -No. l couldn't leave you alone."
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"Merry Christmas. l miss you guys."
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"So is it horrible? ls everybody working really hard?"
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"-l don't know. -Answer better. Answer better."
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"-What does she do there? -She's regional vice president."
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"...and the second prettiest girl in Oklahoma get back to work."
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"-Merry Christmas. -Merry Christmas."
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"-You are to me. -No. No. No!"
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"-Right. So l'm sorry, but-- -Seriously? Happily married?"
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"So that phone call before, that was happy?"
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"Well, look, it's not easy to spend this much time apart."
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"Look, you're a really nice person, ham-stealing and adultery aside."
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"You were the most beautiful woman in the room tonight."
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"-You and l are making out? -Well, not anymore."
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"We weren't that close anyway."
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"Well, you and l are just goofing around."
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"l think you're better than you think you are."
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"l sensed that l should stop."
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"Okay. l have a condom in my wallet that l've had since l was 1 2."
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"We'll bring it back. Just put it under your dress."
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"...l've been thinking."
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"...and another boy."
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"-What else did you think about? -Well..."
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"-l love you so much. -l love you."
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"-What? -What? You--? You really quit your job?"
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"-Well, what do you really wanna do? -l have not thought this through."
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"He sprang to his sleigh To his team gave a whistle"
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"And away they all flew Like the down of a thistle"
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"But I heard him exclaim Ere he drove out of sight"
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"''Merry Christmas to all And to all a good night. ''"
Friends
"Wow! That was great! You really wrote that?"
Friends
"Say goodbye, elves. l'm off to Tulsa."
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"l can't believe you won't be here for Christmas."
Friends
"You're really not coming back?"
Friends
"We have this paperwork that needs to be filed by the end of the year."
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"-lf l don't get it done, l'll be fired. -lt's so unfair."
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"-You don't even like your job. -So. Who does?"
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"-l like my job. -l love my job."
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"-l can't wait to go back to work. -l can't get enough dinosaurs."
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"lt's hard enough not seeing you during the week..."
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"...but for Christmas...."
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"lf this is what you have to do, l understand."
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"Thanks."
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"l'll see you New Year's Day."
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"You're not gonna be here New Year's Eve?"
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"-Did l not mention that? -No."
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"And to all a good night!"
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"All right, everybody. l know it is Christmas Eve..."
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"...and you'd rather be with family, but there is no call for writing..."
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"...''Screw you, Mr. Bing'' on the back of my chair."
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"By the way, you can all call me Chandler."
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"-Hey. -Hey. Where you been?"
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"lt was really beautiful. They have decorations and this huge tree."
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"And l just thought, to hell with them, we have to work."
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"So l stole their ham."
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"Hear that? You may not be with your families..."
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"...but at least it's gonna smell like ham in here."
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"My kid's in a play right now."
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"You know what? l know what will cheer you up."
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"l had a talk with the boys in New York. l told them about all your hard work..."
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"''A donation has been made in your name to the New York City Ballet.''"
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"All right, you want me to say it? This sucks."
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"Now it feels like Christmas."
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"l'm sorry."
Friends
"At least you get to go home and be with your families tonight."
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"l have to go to an empty hotel room and lay down..."
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"Then tomorrow, you get to have Christmas in your own houses."
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"Which, by the way, none of you have invited me to."
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"-You can come to my house. -No, thanks."
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"-lt was a nice pep talk. -Thanks."
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"l'm actually thinking about becoming a motivational speaker."
Friends
"So if you were home right now, what would you be doing?"
Friends
"Typical Christmassy stuff, you know. Our holidays are pretty traditional."
Friends
"Happy holidays, everybody."
Friends
"Pheebs, look in the kitchen. l'll look in the back closet."
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"Yeah. Chandler, why don't you take a walk."
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"This doesn't concern you."
Friends
"We are looking for our Christmas presents from Monica."
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"-What? That's terrible. -No, no. We do it every year."
Friends
"Well, that makes it not terrible."
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"No. Yeah, we never find them. She's always bested us, that wily..."
Friends
"...minx."
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"We're gonna search here for an hour..."
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"...and then we'll go to Joey's and search. Okay?"
Friends
"No, not okay. You can't look for Monica's presents."
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"-No, we have to. -No, you don't have to."
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"And you can't, because l live here too."
Friends
"-Well, then you should look with us. -Why?"
Friends
"Aren't you worried about what to get Monica for Christmas?"
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"No, l have a great idea for a present for her."
Friends
"That's it? ''A great idea''?"
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"That's not enough. What if she gets you a great present..."
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"...two medium presents and lots of little presents..."
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"...and you got her one great present? That's gonna make her feel bad."
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"Why would you do that to her? Why? Why?"
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"-lf l helped, we could find them faster! -Right."
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"Who's it for?"
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"''Dear Losers: Do you really think l'd hide presents under the couch?"
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"P.S. Chandler, l knew they'd break you.''"
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"Rach, these are for you."
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"No, but with this new-car smell, you'll think you do."
Friends
"Okay, Pheebs, your turn."
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"Toilet seat covers!"
Friends
"ls that what you were doing while l was getting gas?"
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"You guys."
Friends
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