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Clips from Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013) - Renewal (S08E08)

"in this marriage for richer or poorer,"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"- I do. - And, Kevin--"
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"- Yes, yes, we're still married."
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"- I've just come back from One Police Plaza,"
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"which I didn't think was technically possible."
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"our police reform program"
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"- That's amazing. - Yes, I know. It is exciting."
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"- Thank you, and since I don't want work to consume my life"
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"I'm gonna be a chief?"
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"- Oh, damn. - Whoo! Yes!"
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"♪"
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"- No, I invested in something dumb."
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"It's an NFT of Michelangelo from the Ninja Turtles"
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"as many of you know,"
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"Kevin and I have recently reconciled."
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"- Noice. Somebody's getting some."
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"- It's true. I am. Now, when we originally wed,"
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"so we had a somewhat rushed ceremony."
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"- Do you, Kevin-- - Yes."
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"- And do you-- - Yes. Yes, we do."
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"We're married."
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"so we're having a vow renewal ceremony."
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"This time, we're pulling out all the stops."
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"It's will be a truly extravagant affair."
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"- Oh, how extravagant are we talking?"
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"- We got the salad forks."
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"Can you believe it, a second fork?"
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"Who do we think we are?"
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"the other surprise I have in store for Kevin."
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"- Don't be absurd. We're not crazy."
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"No, the big surprise is..."
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"I'm retiring from the NYPD."
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"- Wait."
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"- What?"
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"- Why did you lead with the salad forks?"
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"- You're leaving the NYPD?"
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"- My preoccupation with my job"
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"has been a point of contention with Kevin for some time now."
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"I wanna show him that our relationship comes first."
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"- But, sir, it's too soon for you to retire."
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"We didn't even get to do one final cool case together."
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"The last thing we worked"
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"- It was boring as crap!"
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"- I'm so glad you asked."
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"We hunt down a serial killer, stare death in the face,"
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"and then in the final battle, you save my life"
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"and I say to you, "How can I ever repay you?""
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"drive off, never to be seen again."
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"- I don't have a motorcycle, but Kevin and I"
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"did just purchase recumbent bicycles."
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"- you, Captain Holt."
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"- Anyway, I already have"
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"the police reform proposal that Santiago and I"
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"have been toiling over for these past six months."
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"- Oh, my God, I didn't even think about Amy."
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"She's gonna be devastated."
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"- Which is why I made sure she wasn't here when I told you."
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"I need Santiago laser-focused on this proposal."
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"We can tell her after we turn the report in."
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"Hopefully, you can keep the news to yourselves for now."
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"- Sir, she's my wife. I can't lie to her."
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"- What about that time you spent $1,000"
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"on a Patrick Ewing Top Shot?"
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"- That wasn't a lie. I just didn't tell her."
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"But she's gonna be happy about it, because that Top Shot"
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"- Deal. - Great, let's lie to my wife."
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"- Ah, hello."
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"There's a lot to do since we decided to go so over the top."
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"I mean, look at the napkins."
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"lengthwise."
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"- That is...funny."
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"Now you have me doubting everything."
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"I got something I wanna ask him anyway."
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"There you are. Why are you hiding?"
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"- Oh, I was just looking at pornography."
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"I felt an urgent need to watch some men taking a bath."
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"- What?"
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"- Okay, fine, you caught me. I was checking my email."
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"- And that's worse than watching porn?"
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"- Much worse."
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"Kevin can't know I'm working on our special day."
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"But I just received an email from my contact"
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"at One Police Plaza about our reform proposal."
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"- Ah, yeah, speaking of that, now that the report is done,"
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"I don't like lying to her."
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"- So then you told her about the Top Shot?"
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"- I didn't need to because I traded it for an investment"
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"in The Rock's new cryptocurrency,"
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"which is currently worth--"
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"oh, no, what happened to RockCoin?"
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"The brass is having a closed-door meeting today"
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"about our reform proposal, but apparently,"
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"the union is gonna claim that we fudged our numbers."
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"- That's crazy."
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"Amy would never fudge numbers. She loves numbers."
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"Sometimes I think she loves them more than me."
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"Stupid numbers, think they're so great."
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"I'd love to see numbers give you a baby."
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"- I'm gonna check those CompStat numbers right now."
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"I'm just gonna click on this video link entitled"
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"- Oh, my God."
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"- What? This isn't correct."
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"Somebody changed these since last night."
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"- Wait."
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"- They're trying to kill... - Jake and Holt..."
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"Yep. Mm-hmm."
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"Two equally important sets of stakes."
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"- I would never fabricate numbers."
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"I love numbers."
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"- Numbers can't be a father to your child, Amy."
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"- So what are we gonna do? - I have a plan."
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"We can prove that O'Sullivan changed the CompStat numbers"
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"if we find this. - What is that, a bed?"
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"- No, that's a cheese grater. - It's his computer."
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"Fortunately, I know how to find his personal computer"
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"thanks to his YouTube rants about the NHL."
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"- This is "Islanders Talk,""
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"can hockey have female fans?"
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"in O'Sullivan's basement,"
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"so that's gotta be where his laptop is."
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