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Clips from The Goldbergs (2013) - Weird Science (S05E05)

"And maybe, please, let your mom know that I gave them to you."
The Goldbergs (2013)
"Sure."
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"Wow. Right in front of me."
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"I just met a totally radical guitarist, so don't wait up."
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"Really? 'Cause I thought that we could hang out"
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"and get to know each other."
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"I feel like I already know you"
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"because your mom's been telling me, like, a lot of stories."
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"Why are my parents still here?"
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"Your dad napped and then took a cab back to the hotel."
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"He's a sweaty man."
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"Anyway, like, bye."
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"Erica knew it was time to send my mom home..."
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"Ta-da!"
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"...but my mom brought our entire home to her."
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"This seems concerning."
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"I made it look just like your old bedroom"
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"so you wouldn't get homesick."
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"Oh, I even brought Donnie,"
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"your favorite new boy in the neighborhood."
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"He's a New Kid on the Block,"
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"he doesn't belong here, and neither do you."
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"Just please go."
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"Oh, I can't leave now. It's dark outside."
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"- So? - So, I have horrible"
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"night vision and can't get behind the wheel."
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"You have a perfectly good bed back at your motel."
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"You need to get in the car and go."
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"And miss a turn and hit a semi and flip the car"
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"and end up pinned under the steering wheel"
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"while the station wagon burns around me?"
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"Is that what you want for your mother?"
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"It was classic Bev guilt, which totally worked."
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"College is fun."
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"While Erica settled in for a co-ed nightmare,"
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"Barry was dreaming about his old flame, Lainey Lewis."
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"Hey, handsome."
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"Just for fun and no other reason,"
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"what qualities are you looking for in a lover?"
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"Wait, why are you asking me about beautiful bikini babes?"
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"I just thought, maybe, I could help you find"
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"a new girlfriend to start your year of awesome."
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"What would I let someone who wears my butt"
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"as a hat set me up with a girl?"
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"As expected, Barry wasn't biting,"
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"so I had to get creative."
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"Too bad, 'cause my plan was to "Weird Science""
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"you up a hot girl."
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"Dude, a computer can't really do that."
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"It can do anything."
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"Did you know a computer just defeated"
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"the world's greatest chess champion?"
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"- In chess? - Yes!"
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"No!"
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"Why wasn't I told?!"
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"Stupid Dan Rather!"
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"Just jot down some things you might like in a lady,"
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"and I'll use list to whip you up a hot babe of your liking."
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"While I'm excited to put all my eggs in this basket,"
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"I still need scientific proof."
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"Mr. Connelly! It's a scholastic emergency!"
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"Come as fast as you can."
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"You're a really good science teacher."
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"- I got a question. - No, no."
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"- Don't bother the man. - Zip it, little nerd."
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"I need to talk to the big nerd."
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"Sir, in your expert scientific opinion,"
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"is it possible for me to "Weird Science" up a girlfriend?"
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"It was game-over."
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"Scientifically speaking..."
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"My teacher always took science seriously."
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"Absolutely."
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"Until he didn't."
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"I knew it!"
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"Watch out, Kelly LeBrock."
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"Big Tasty's comin' for ya."
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"Why would you lie like that?"
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"Between you and me,"
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"I have a butt-wad of an older brother, too."
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"You know, I'm using that movie to find him a girlfriend"
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"so he won't beat me up."
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"Would he actually fall for that?"
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"Dude, come on!"
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"Let's go make me this girl already."
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"Every week, he surprises us."
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"Whoo! Year of awesome!"
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"My mom was so psyched to be spending"
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"the first night of college with Erica,"
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"she literally couldn't sleep."
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"Okay, stop. What are you doing?"
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"Assembling your safety credenza."
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"First aid, fire ladder, canned foods, powdered milk,"
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"and a handheld siren to alert rescuers"
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"when you're caught in rubble."
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"It's really loud. Want to hear?"
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"I am in college. I don't need any credenzas."
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"Now go to bed before someone finds out"
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"that you're still here."
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"Evening, Erica."
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"I wanted to inform you and Erica of tonight's freshman mixer"
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"that the school has mandated me to throw."
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""Jamaican' Me Crazy" party?"
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"Ya, mon!"
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"This doesn't come naturally to me."
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"Can this be over, now?"
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"As long as you're there."
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"The kids you meet tonight might end up"
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"being your friends for life."
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"Of course, my college friends are now doctors and lawyers"
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"while I pursue a foolish dream"
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"of making art from everyday garbage."
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"Like Nick from "Family Ties"?"
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"It was my idea first."
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"Anyway, uh, thanks for the invite,"
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"but I have company in here already."
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"As in... romantic company?"
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"Why do you care?"
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"I just don't know what I'm gonna tell your mother!"
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"She got to you, didn't she? You've been compromised."
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"Srini betrayed me! Open that door."
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