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Clips from NewsRadio - The Secret of Management (S04E04)

"Cadbury, come play Skee-Ball for my amusement."
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"Oh, I got something. I got 'em. I got 'em."
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"[ Yelps ]"
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"Secret number 434,"
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""The boss is never wrong.""
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"Secret number 435,"
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""When in doubt,"
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"6:30 in the morning."
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"Oh! Which brings me to secret 436."
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""I'm with stupid.""
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"Oh, and what if you're managing something and you're standing right next to a stupid guy?"
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"None of these are secrets. They're not secrets."
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"They're stupid clichés that I have heard one hundred times."
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"All right. All right. But who do you think wrote those clichés?"
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"- Nobody wrote them. - Yeah, well, that's where you're wrong."
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"Because..."
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"Okay. Okay. So you mean to tell me that you..."
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"No, no. Lisa, Lisa,"
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"you're sittin' in the house that "Honk If You're Horny" built."
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"Look, Lisa, I know they're a bunch of dumb clichés individually,"
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"but if you string 'em all together there's a single,"
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"unifying thread and the secret will reveal itself."
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"So, it's like a puzzle. Exactly."
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"Okay. So, have you figured it out?"
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"Do you know what the Secret of Management is?"
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"Always consider sound advice,"
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"but only follow your own instincts."
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"Secret 437, "It's hard to fly with the eagles when you're surrounded by turkeys.""
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"Secret 4--"
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"Cadbury's gone."
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"- If I was that dude I would've quit a long time ago. - Oh, he didn't quit."
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"and stole my wallet, my credit cards, my TV, my stereo,"
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"- Did you call the police? - Oh, yes, and I explained the whole story."
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"- What'd they say? - I believe their exact words were,"
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"and he must have told me 500 of those stupid sayings. Five hundred? Hmm."
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"That ought to put you about one-sixth of the way through."
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"Good. Also, do you have a pager? No."
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"Uh, can I go to the bathroom? No."
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"Secret 597,"
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"No, he's not. Look."
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"Okay, sir. Okay. Oh, oh, but Mr. James,"
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"Anyway, what'd you want to talk to me about?"
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"Mm-hmm. Do you remember the time that you and I..."
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"Yeah? I don't quite know how to say this,"
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"Yes, I can. I can. Try me. Just try me. I-- Yeah?"
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"No! See, it's not the same!"
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"- The secret of what? - Nothin'. I-- I--"
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"Look, sir. Bye."
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"Bill? Who's that man, and what the hell is he doing?"
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"- Isn't that right, Cadbury? - The master is correct, sir."
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"so he went out and hired--"
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"Oh, that's sweet. Did Bill say anything?"
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"It's like nobody even notices that I'm-I'm back."
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"Uh, Bill-- Sir, may I help you?"
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"Yeah, I need to talk to Bill."
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"[ No Audible Dialogue ]"
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"Sir, would you mind if I just came down there?"
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"All right. Wow."
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"I'm not really sure what most of these buttons do. Lisa?"
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"Wha-- Your pizza pie, sir."
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"Thank you, Cadbury. He's indispensable."
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"You know, this place doesn't seem as fun as it used to be..."
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"Quite amusing, Master Matthew."
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"Huh?"
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"Mr. James, "I'm with stupid"..."
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"- What? You fire him already? - No, he woke up early this morning..."
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"my refrigerator and most of my furniture."
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""What kind of a jackass hires a discount butler..."
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"No."
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"I don't have your home phone. I'll write it down for you, sir."
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"We should try to do something to cheer Matthew up."
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"Oh, I-I found a better supplier for our program guides."
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"What if I took on Muammar Qaddafi? I mean, really let him have it?"
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"Ah. Well, Bill, we're not living in 19th-century England."
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"was the Secret of Management? What?"
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"- His new house? - I guess so. What's it like?"
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"begin."
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"[ Screaming ] Oh, I'm sorry, Lisa!"
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"We were up till 7:00 in the morning..."
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"That's neither here nor there. Plenty of people, right, Cadbury?"
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"You can have the stapler. Well, thanks. It's my stapler. Great."
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"Let the-- [ Presses Buttons ]"
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"It's time for my break."
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"Oh, I swear to God! All these buttons look the same!"
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"Who told you about the Secret of Management? You did."
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"what you can put off till tomorrow.""
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"Never mind. Okay."
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"[ Sighs ]"
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"Here's the rundown for today's Shut Up, New York."
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"Yeah. That's right. Make funky, Cadbury."
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"Maybe we should take him to lunch. Or better yet, get someone else to do it."
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"Dude, Bill's not comin'. It's just Beth and me."
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"were kind of high, so I--"
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"- You mean, you don't want me to know. - No, trust me."
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"Yeah, this place kicks ass."
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"Pleasure to meet you, Cadbury."
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"Well, all right. All right. [ Clears Throat ]"
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"Okay."
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"What do you want? I was just, uh,"
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"♪ [ Orchestral ]"
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"♪ [ Orchestral ] Ow!"
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"from a classified ad in the local PennySaver?""
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"I mean, I didn't actually say that, but I said it up there in my head."
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"[ Both Laughing ]"
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"Well, anyway, I was, uh,"
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"That Lisa's sure got some cute ass, huh?"
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"Yes, she does. Thank you."
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"Bill, why did you hire a butler?"
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"Too hot."
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"[ Ringing ]"
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"I'd be happy to give it to him on his return."
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"You know. Secret. Yeah."
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"Of course he did. Yeah. It's funny. Who would have thought that..."
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"Good plan."
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"Aha. And that's the Secret of Management?"
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"has nothing to do with management."
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"- May I help you, sir? - Uh, no, no, no."
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"♪ [ Disco ]"
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