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Clips from The Detour - The City (S02E02)

"Oh, shit."
The Detour
"Like a compliment?"
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"Imagine something your dad said"
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"to your mom on their wedding day."
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"to get a pretty woman like your mom."
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"What would he say?"
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"Hey, you want to [Bleep] and order a pizza?"
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"Yeah, I get it."
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"I love this guy."
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"Well, I love you too, s... yeah."
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"Move your vehicle! Now!"
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"I'm trying to. I'm just a little stuck here."
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"People are dying because you can't parallel park!"
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"Teenagers can parallel park better than you."
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"Girl teenagers."
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"Because women aren't allowed to drive there. It's sexist."
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"God, this guy is being such an asshole."
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"Boys, this guy thinks we're a bunch of assholes!"
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"I'll just get it in. I-I will get it in."
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"I promise."
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"Boys."
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"♪ Let's get, let's get, let's get, let's get parked! ♪"
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"We're just gonna sleep in the truck?"
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"We just need some time to think, all right?"
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"Chase! Let's go."
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"Yeah, come on, kids. Get away from those squatters."
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"What part of that is cooling off?"
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"Say it again, woman. I dare you."
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"No, not really."
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"Sorry, Poppin' Fresh?"
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"- No one said it was. - Nate, we have a contract."
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"Okay? It is a legal contract that we have,"
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"- and we are entitled to this place. - Well, legally they have"
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"- Heard of it? - I have."
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"They didn't land on 125th street."
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"125th Street landed on them."
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"This is 153rd Street."
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"And we don't need you to talk for us."
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"- We can speak for ourselves, Lars. - No, no, no, no."
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"it's my turn to carry the baton."
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"This isn't a black and white thing."
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"It's an asshole/not asshole thing."
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"I'm a podiatrist."
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"that says it's distinction without difference."
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"Octothorp woke."
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"Get your own opinions."
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"Why do you go silent at times like these?"
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"All I got to tell you is that this is our property,"
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"and we're not going anywhere."
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"- That's a classic squatter play. - That..."
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"As in the snowman?"
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"Not really. He was a jolly, happy soul."
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"Everybody just needs to calm down!"
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"There's not a lot of mean names to call white people."
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"What about snowflake?"
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"They're beautiful and unique."
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"Casper?"
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"The ghost who can't scare anyone?"
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"What about bird turd?"
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"Why are you his friend and not mine?"
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"Juice?"
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"Yeah, I'll drink your juice."
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"Oh, we didn't start the fire. It's always been that way."
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"No. No one's fighting here."
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"Well, yes. But that's not why I'm saying it."
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"Whoa, what the hell is going on here?"
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"- We have squatters. - Whoa, whoa, whoa."
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"You know how offensive that is? And I should know."
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"- Excuse me? - The Irish."
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"- Mm, no really. - Yes. Really."
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"Where do you think the expression"
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"- "Black Irish" came from? - Their hair color."
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"Why would you put it on your back?"
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"So every day, when I look in the mirror..."
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"It'd be backwards."
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"Just like them."
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"You're one of the good ones, Doc."
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"Then why did you rent our apartment to them?"
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"I told you we weren't moving."
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"No. That's 5B."
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"- No, see, that's a "D." - That's a "B.""
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"- Nah. - Mm."
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"Well, yeah maybe. I see that."
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"You almost incited a race war"
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"I said "D as in dagel.""
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"- Dagel's not a word. - Yes, it is."
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"What the hell is that?"
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"Dagel. He's my dog."
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"Why didn't you say "D as in dog"?"
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"Why did you assume I said "B as in bagel"?"
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"Because I'm half Jewish?"
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"Because I got a little oppression"
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"I, uh..."
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"I don't."
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"It's pretty nasty, but I don't want her to know."
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"What did he say?"
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"He don't like the juice."
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"- Huh? - Wha?"
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"- The juice. - Sorry, what?"
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"- Juice! - What about them?"
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"No, he doesn't hate..."
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"Um..."
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"Then why you destroy our car?"
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"I didn't know it was a Jewish car."
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"And what does a Jewish car even look like?"
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"You know, maybe New York is not for you guys."
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"See?"
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"You can see into everyone's apartment."
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"Hey, guys, I know today wasn't"
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"the smoothest journey getting here,"
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"'cause, you know, we're just not good on the road,"
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"Yeah. Let's check out more windows."
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"No! No!"
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"What is wrong?"
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"Oh, my God. Why is that hunk of metal all of a sudden"
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"Okay, I'm sorry. I get it."
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"Good things happen to good people."
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"Nobody."
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"I wasn't a good person when I lived here."
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"Oh, my God. Did you murder someone when you lived here?"
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