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Clips from Cheers - Snow Job (S02E02)

SO, WHAT DO YOU SAY WE GO BACK THERE SHOOT SOME STICK?

"SO, WHAT DO YOU SAY WE GO BACK THERE SHOOT SOME STICK?"

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ALL RIGHT, ONLY IF YOU DO THAT TRICK

"ALL RIGHT, ONLY IF YOU DO THAT TRICK"

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WHERE YOU JAM THE CUES UP YOUR NOSTRILS

"WHERE YOU JAM THE CUES UP YOUR NOSTRILS"

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AND MAKE LIKE A WALRUS.

"AND MAKE LIKE A WALRUS."

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OH, RIGHT. I GOT A NEW TWIST ON IT.

"OH, RIGHT. I GOT A NEW TWIST ON IT."

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I GET THE FAT ENDS IN THERE NOW.

"I GET THE FAT ENDS IN THERE NOW."

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OH, HO, OK.

"OH, HO, OK."

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THE FAT END YOU SAY, HUH?

"THE FAT END YOU SAY, HUH?"

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GEE, WE'RE ALMOST OUT OF OLIVES.

"GEE, WE'RE ALMOST OUT OF OLIVES."

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I WONDER IF SAM ORDERED ANY.

"I WONDER IF SAM ORDERED ANY."

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GEE, COACH, WHY DON'T YOU JUST ASK HIM?

"GEE, COACH, WHY DON'T YOU JUST ASK HIM?"

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WHY, WHERE'S SAM?

"WHY, WHERE'S SAM?"

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WELL, I THOUGHT THAT YOU SAID

"WELL, I THOUGHT THAT YOU SAID"

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SAM WAS COMING TONIGHT, DIANE.

"SAM WAS COMING TONIGHT, DIANE."

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HE IS, CARLA.

"HE IS, CARLA."

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HE'S PROBABLY JUST COMING AROUND THE CORNER,

"HE'S PROBABLY JUST COMING AROUND THE CORNER,"

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RIGHT DOWN THE STAIRS AT THIS MOMENT.

"RIGHT DOWN THE STAIRS AT THIS MOMENT."

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THEN I SHOULD HURRY RIGHT OVER THERE AND GREET HIM,

"THEN I SHOULD HURRY RIGHT OVER THERE AND GREET HIM,"

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OPEN THE DOOR FOR MY BOSS ON HIS RETURN.

"OPEN THE DOOR FOR MY BOSS ON HIS RETURN."

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HELLO THERE, SAM!

"HELLO THERE, SAM!"

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HI, CARLA.

"HI, CARLA."

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SKI WEEKEND, RIGHT? HUH?

"SKI WEEKEND, RIGHT? HUH?"

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WHAT?

"WHAT?"

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COME ON, I WAS THREE MILES AWAY FROM MY AUNT'S HOUSE,

"COME ON, I WAS THREE MILES AWAY FROM MY AUNT'S HOUSE,"

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THREE MILES,

"THREE MILES,"

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AND ALL OF A SUDDEN IT CAME TO ME.

"AND ALL OF A SUDDEN IT CAME TO ME."

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SKI WEEKEND, HUH? AM I RIGHT?

"SKI WEEKEND, HUH? AM I RIGHT?"

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SORRY, SAM, I'M A LITTLE CONFUSED.

"SORRY, SAM, I'M A LITTLE CONFUSED."

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WHAT SKI WEEKEND?

"WHAT SKI WEEKEND?"

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OH, COME ON, SOMEBODY PROBABLY TOLD YOU

"OH, COME ON, SOMEBODY PROBABLY TOLD YOU"

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THAT I USED TO GO SKIING WITH MY BUDDIES ON THIS WEEKEND.

"THAT I USED TO GO SKIING WITH MY BUDDIES ON THIS WEEKEND."

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NOW THAT YOU MENTION IT,

"NOW THAT YOU MENTION IT,"

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I BELIEVE CARLA SAID SOMETHING ABOUT THAT.

"I BELIEVE CARLA SAID SOMETHING ABOUT THAT."

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I KNEW IT. I KNEW IT!

"I KNEW IT. I KNEW IT!"

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TWO DRAFTS.

"TWO DRAFTS."

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AND ALL OF A SUDDEN, BECAUSE OF THAT,

"AND ALL OF A SUDDEN, BECAUSE OF THAT,"

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YOU DECIDE THAT I'M LYING ABOUT MY UNCLE NATHAN.

"YOU DECIDE THAT I'M LYING ABOUT MY UNCLE NATHAN."

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WELL, FOR A MOMENT THERE,

"WELL, FOR A MOMENT THERE,"

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I WAS A TRIFLE SUSPICIOUS.

"I WAS A TRIFLE SUSPICIOUS."

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THAT IS TOTALLY, TOTALLY SILLY, HONEY.

"THAT IS TOTALLY, TOTALLY SILLY, HONEY."

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THAT SKI WEEKEND IS PART OF MY PAST.

"THAT SKI WEEKEND IS PART OF MY PAST."

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HEY, COME ON,

"HEY, COME ON,"

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WHAT KIND OF GUY WITH A SWELL CHICK LIKE YOURSELF

"WHAT KIND OF GUY WITH A SWELL CHICK LIKE YOURSELF"

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WOULD GO FOOL AROUND?

"WOULD GO FOOL AROUND?"

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ANYWAY, EVEN WHEN I WAS ON THAT SKI WEEKEND,

"ANYWAY, EVEN WHEN I WAS ON THAT SKI WEEKEND,"

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I DIDN'T FOOL AROUND THAT MUCH.

"I DIDN'T FOOL AROUND THAT MUCH."

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SO EVEN IF I WERE,

"SO EVEN IF I WERE,"

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I WOULDN'T BE DOING IT AS MUCH AS YOU THINK.

"I WOULDN'T BE DOING IT AS MUCH AS YOU THINK."

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AND I'M NOT, SO IT'S EVEN LESS...

"AND I'M NOT, SO IT'S EVEN LESS..."

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OR NONE.

"OR NONE."

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SO...YOU FEEL OK NOW?

"SO...YOU FEEL OK NOW?"

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I WAS NEVER NOT OK.

"I WAS NEVER NOT OK."

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YOU WEREN'T? GREAT. GREAT.

"YOU WEREN'T? GREAT. GREAT."

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BOY, WHAT A SILLY MISUNDERSTANDING THIS WAS.

"BOY, WHAT A SILLY MISUNDERSTANDING THIS WAS."

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SAM.

"SAM."

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WHAT?

"WHAT?"

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THERE WAS NEVER A MISUNDERSTANDING.

"THERE WAS NEVER A MISUNDERSTANDING."

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I KNEW THE TRUTH THE WHOLE TIME.

"I KNEW THE TRUTH THE WHOLE TIME."

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WELL, THAT'S GREAT. THAT'S GREAT.

"WELL, THAT'S GREAT. THAT'S GREAT."

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WELL, I'M OFF AGAIN.

"WELL, I'M OFF AGAIN."

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OK.

"OK."

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IF YOU WERE GOING TO LIE ABOUT THIS WEEKEND,

"IF YOU WERE GOING TO LIE ABOUT THIS WEEKEND,"

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YOU CERTAINLY WOULD HAVE COME UP WITH SOMETHING

"YOU CERTAINLY WOULD HAVE COME UP WITH SOMETHING"

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A LOT SMARTER THAN THIS UNCLE'S FUNERAL THING.

"A LOT SMARTER THAN THIS UNCLE'S FUNERAL THING."

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WHAT DO YOU MEAN BY THAT?

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN BY THAT?"

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I COULD CHECK ON IT IN A MINUTE.

"I COULD CHECK ON IT IN A MINUTE."

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ALL I HAVE TO DO IS CALL UP THE LOCAL NEWSPAPER

"ALL I HAVE TO DO IS CALL UP THE LOCAL NEWSPAPER"

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AND ASK THEM TO CHECK ON THEIR DEATH NOTICES FOR THE LAST FEW DAYS.

"AND ASK THEM TO CHECK ON THEIR DEATH NOTICES FOR THE LAST FEW DAYS."

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OH, YEAH, OF COURSE. EVERYBODY KNOWS THAT.

"OH, YEAH, OF COURSE. EVERYBODY KNOWS THAT."

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OK, WELL, I GOT TO SKEDADDLE.

"OK, WELL, I GOT TO SKEDADDLE."

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I GOT A FUNERAL WAITING FOR ME.

"I GOT A FUNERAL WAITING FOR ME."

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DON'T WE ALL?

"DON'T WE ALL?"

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WELL, SLATS, YOU BLEW IT AGAIN.

"WELL, SLATS, YOU BLEW IT AGAIN."

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THIS TIME HE'S GONE.

"THIS TIME HE'S GONE."

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HE'LL BE BACK WITHIN THE HOUR.

"HE'LL BE BACK WITHIN THE HOUR."

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DAMN TROPICAL DRINKS.

"DAMN TROPICAL DRINKS."

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GEE, COACH, IT'S TOO BAD ABOUT THE RECORD.

"GEE, COACH, IT'S TOO BAD ABOUT THE RECORD."

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WE WERE REALLY PULLING FOR YOU, COACH.

"WE WERE REALLY PULLING FOR YOU, COACH."

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YEAH, AND I CAME SO CLOSE,

"YEAH, AND I CAME SO CLOSE,"

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BUT DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT, EVERYBODY.

"BUT DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT, EVERYBODY."

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I STILL GOT A PERSONAL RECORD I'M VERY PROUD OF.

"I STILL GOT A PERSONAL RECORD I'M VERY PROUD OF."

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WHAT'S THAT?

"WHAT'S THAT?"

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11 CONSECUTIVE DAYS WITHOUT STARTING A MAJOR FIRE.

"11 CONSECUTIVE DAYS WITHOUT STARTING A MAJOR FIRE."

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DIANE...

"DIANE..."

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IT'S ALMOST CLOSING TIME.

"IT'S ALMOST CLOSING TIME."

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YOU SAID THAT SAM WOULD BE BACK

"YOU SAID THAT SAM WOULD BE BACK"

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BEFORE CLOSING TIME.

"BEFORE CLOSING TIME."

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DAMN!

"DAMN!"

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OK, LET'S YOU AND ME STOP PLAYING GAMES, HUH?

"OK, LET'S YOU AND ME STOP PLAYING GAMES, HUH?"

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ALMS, ALMS FOR THE DINK.

"ALMS, ALMS FOR THE DINK."

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POOR DEVIL.

"POOR DEVIL."

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HEY, WOULD YOU JUST LEAVE ME ALONE, PLEASE, ALL OF YOU?

"HEY, WOULD YOU JUST LEAVE ME ALONE, PLEASE, ALL OF YOU?"

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YOU KNOW, I WAS ALMOST ALL THE WAY UP THERE THIS TIME

"YOU KNOW, I WAS ALMOST ALL THE WAY UP THERE THIS TIME"

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BEFORE IT HIT ME--

"BEFORE IT HIT ME--"

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YOU DON'T BELIEVE ME.

"YOU DON'T BELIEVE ME."

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I KNOW IT. YOU DON'T BELIEVE ME.

"I KNOW IT. YOU DON'T BELIEVE ME."

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I THINK THAT IS ROTTEN, REALLY ROTTEN.

"I THINK THAT IS ROTTEN, REALLY ROTTEN."

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OHH!

"OHH!"

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SAM, I'VE NEVER SEEN YOU LIKE THIS.

"SAM, I'VE NEVER SEEN YOU LIKE THIS."

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YOU'RE ACTING CRAZY.

"YOU'RE ACTING CRAZY."

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AND IT'S SO LATE NOW,

"AND IT'S SO LATE NOW,"

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YOU'RE EVEN GOING TO MISS YOUR UNCLE'S FUNERAL TOMORROW.

"YOU'RE EVEN GOING TO MISS YOUR UNCLE'S FUNERAL TOMORROW."

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JUST TELL ME DO YOU EXPECT ME TO ENJOY A FUNERAL

"JUST TELL ME DO YOU EXPECT ME TO ENJOY A FUNERAL"

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WHEN YOU'RE MAKING ME NUTS LIKE THIS?

"WHEN YOU'RE MAKING ME NUTS LIKE THIS?"

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I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT.

"I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT."

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LIKE HELL YOU DON'T.

"LIKE HELL YOU DON'T."

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EVERY TIME I WALK THROUGH THAT DOOR,

"EVERY TIME I WALK THROUGH THAT DOOR,"

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YOU SAY SOME LITTLE THING TO MAKE ME DRIVE ALL THE WAY BACK DOWN.

"YOU SAY SOME LITTLE THING TO MAKE ME DRIVE ALL THE WAY BACK DOWN."

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I'VE BEEN ON THAT ROAD SO MANY TIMES

"I'VE BEEN ON THAT ROAD SO MANY TIMES"

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THEY'VE CHANGED THE SIGN TO "WELCOME TO VERMONT, SAM."

"THEY'VE CHANGED THE SIGN TO "WELCOME TO VERMONT, SAM.""

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WHAT ARE YOU ACCUSING ME OF?

"WHAT ARE YOU ACCUSING ME OF?"

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I'M ACCUSING YOU

"I'M ACCUSING YOU"

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OF ACCUSING ME OF BEING A LIAR.

"OF ACCUSING ME OF BEING A LIAR."

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I MEAN, ALL THAT CRAP ABOUT CALLING THE NEWSPAPER,

"I MEAN, ALL THAT CRAP ABOUT CALLING THE NEWSPAPER,"

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YOU JUST SAID THAT TO GET ME CRAZY, HUH?

"YOU JUST SAID THAT TO GET ME CRAZY, HUH?"

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YOU AND I BOTH KNOW THAT YOU WOULDN'T MAKE THAT CALL,

"YOU AND I BOTH KNOW THAT YOU WOULDN'T MAKE THAT CALL,"

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WOULD YOU?

"WOULD YOU?"

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WOULD YOU?

"WOULD YOU?"

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YOU DID IT!

"YOU DID IT!"

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OH, GOD, YOU CALLED THEM!

"OH, GOD, YOU CALLED THEM!"

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