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Clips from Family Guy - Must Love Dogs (S20E20)

"so now you have to play this."
Family Guy
"Thanks for coming with me, Peter."
Family Guy
"I need a dog for my date,"
Family Guy
"but I don't know the first thing about 'em."
Family Guy
"No problem, Quagmire. But just know"
Family Guy
"I'm gonna spend most of the time here"
Family Guy
"finding the courage to hold an iguana."
Family Guy
"Here he is."
Family Guy
"I'm not sure I'm ready!"
Family Guy
"(barking)"
Family Guy
"Uh, excuse me, how much is that one?"
Family Guy
"Oh, he's a purebred Bichon Frise,"
Family Guy
"so he's $1,500."
Family Guy
"For a dog?! Um, and‐and what's your return policy?"
Family Guy
"Is it, like, full money back within ten days?"
Family Guy
"Sir, if you're not interested, I have to comb feces"
Family Guy
"out of the guinea pigs' hair with a wet paper towel."
Family Guy
"Go ahead, you can touch him."
Family Guy
"(gasps)"
Family Guy
"It's dry."
Family Guy
"Sorry we couldn't get you a dog."
Family Guy
"Come on in, we'll have however many beers it takes"
Family Guy
"to forget how depressing the shelter was."
Family Guy
"I'll go get those aforementioned beers."
Family Guy
"Thanks, word‐a‐day calendar."
Family Guy
"Oh, hey, Quagmire."
Family Guy
"Mm."
Family Guy
"I mean, mmm, there he is!"
Family Guy
"Brian the dog!"
Family Guy
"What's going on here? Why are you using my full name?"
Family Guy
"All right, let's cut to the chase."
Family Guy
"I like chases."
Family Guy
"Okay, look, I'm seeing this woman,"
Family Guy
"and there's something different about her."
Family Guy
"I mean, it's not just that the sex is great, which it is,"
Family Guy
"but I appreciate her as a person,"
Family Guy
"which sounds kind of weird coming out of my mouth."
Family Guy
"Anyway, I told her I have a dog, so..."
Family Guy
"would you pretend to be my dog?"
Family Guy
"(laughing)"
Family Guy
"Well, well, well."
Family Guy
"Well, well, well."
Family Guy
"Well, well, well."
Family Guy
"Brian, come on, I'm serious. Will you help me out?"
Family Guy
"Glenn Quagmire, there are not enough"
Family Guy
"tennis balls in the world for me to‐‐"
Family Guy
"- I have six. - I'll do it."
Family Guy
"(dogs barking, howling)"
Family Guy
"Thanks for doing this, Brian."
Family Guy
"And remember, just act like a normal,"
Family Guy
"well‐behaved, non‐talking dog."
Family Guy
"- Non‐talking? - Yeah, just bark and stuff."
Family Guy
"Bark? Geez, it's been a while."
Family Guy
"Let me give it a try."
Family Guy
"Brack."
Family Guy
""Brack"? What the hell is that?"
Family Guy
"- I'm finding it. - Damn it, Brian!"
Family Guy
"I knew you were gonna screw this up for me."
Family Guy
"I thought you wanted to help."
Family Guy
""Help"? I'm not doing this because I want to help."
Family Guy
"I'm only doing this so I can have a front‐row seat"
Family Guy
"when you crash and burn."
Family Guy
"Okay, first of all, it's incredibly insensitive"
Family Guy
"to say "crash and burn" to a pilot."
Family Guy
"And, second, how dare you?"
Family Guy
"How dare you, Brian the dog?"
Family Guy
"You know I'm right‐‐ you're gonna get tired of the sex,"
Family Guy
"and then you'll move on to the next one."
Family Guy
"Oh, 'cause you know everything, right?"
Family Guy
"Well, you're wrong, Brian."
Family Guy
"Okay, shut up, here she comes."
Family Guy
"Hi, Glenn. This is Dexter."
Family Guy
"Aw, and who's this little guy?"
Family Guy
"Uh, uh, this is... Harvey."
Family Guy
"Named after Weinstein, uh..."
Family Guy
"'C‐Cause you can see his balls when he answers the door."
Family Guy
"I may be dating myself, but in the '90s,"
Family Guy
"the funniest thing you could do was show people your balls."
Family Guy
"C‐Can you start talking now, please?"
Family Guy
"Sorry, I couldn't hear you"
Family Guy
"'cause my dog was licking my ear."
Family Guy
"Oh, thank God. This is my dog, Bob..."
Family Guy
"Weinstein."
Family Guy
"He's man's best friend"
Family Guy
"because he's very good at keeping quiet."
Family Guy
"Do you mind if I take five minutes in the parking lot?"
Family Guy
"This is Spot."
Family Guy
"All right, Rupert, when the thief comes back"
Family Guy
"for the rest of my candy,"
Family Guy
"he'll have to deal with my latest invention."
Family Guy
"Hey, Stewie, what are you d‐‐"
Family Guy
"(exclaims) Aah! Help! Somebody help me!"
Family Guy
"I won't survive on the inside!"
Family Guy
"(grunts) Thief! I've caught you!"
Family Guy
"Chris?"
Family Guy
"Stewie, get off."
Family Guy
"I haven't been stealing your candy."
Family Guy
"- Dad has. - The fat man?"
Family Guy
"He did the same thing to me when I was younger."
Family Guy
"The only way to keep him away from it is to hide it."
Family Guy
"And that's why I'm here."
Family Guy
"I'm gonna help you."
Family Guy
"Really? You'd do that for me?"
Family Guy
"Of course, Stewie. We're family."
Family Guy
"We look out for each other,"
Family Guy
"like the people on Succession."
Family Guy
"Well, don't leave me hanging like that‐‐ throw out a name!"
Family Guy
"- Tom. - Oh, Tom!"
Family Guy
"Can you believe Tom?"
Family Guy
"Carrie's gonna be here soon. Can you give me a hand getting"
Family Guy
"- this cat stuff out of here? - Where is your cat, anyway?"
Family Guy
"I don't know. No cat owner knows where their cat is."
Family Guy
"Okay, but I still don't know why"
Family Guy
"you're going through all this trouble."
Family Guy
"I mean, you're just gonna bail and leave her in the dust."
Family Guy
"- Hey, how's your son, Brian? - Whoa!"
Family Guy
"What happened to DEFCON four, three, and two?"
Family Guy
"- (doorbell rings) - Okay, she's here."
Family Guy
"Get off the couch."
Family Guy
"- Who is it? - It's The Purge."
Family Guy
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