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Clips from Lucifer - Is This Really How It's Going To End?! (S05E05)

"[Saraqael] Why bother, Lucifer? You're not getting my vote."
Lucifer
"Yeah, I supported you once in the rebellion,"
Lucifer
"but then I had to suffer Dad's passive-aggressive wrath."
Lucifer
"And try climbing out of that proverbial doghouse."
Lucifer
"And it certainly doesn't help your case that even Jophiel,"
Lucifer
"who, let's face it, is an idiot,"
Lucifer
"even he thinks your pitch is lacking."
Lucifer
"-Truth is I'm only here as a courtesy. -[both chuckle]"
Lucifer
"Saraqael. Sara."
Lucifer
"What is it you truly desire?"
Lucifer
"You seriously think I'm going to fall for your silly little parlor trick?"
Lucifer
"[chuckles] A not-so-wise woman recently suggested I lean into my strengths."
Lucifer
"Too bad she didn't teach you how to cut your losses."
Lucifer
"I learned I needed to ask not what the angels can do for you,"
Lucifer
"but what can you do for the angels?"
Lucifer
"I have no idea what that means."
Lucifer
"It means you're right."
Lucifer
"I shouldn't try and convince you I'd be a better God than Michael."
Lucifer
"What I should do is the one thing I can do better than anyone"
Lucifer
"and that is grant favors."
Lucifer
"So, again, I humbly ask you,"
Lucifer
"what is it you desire?"
Lucifer
"[scoffs] I'm an angel, Lucifer, I'm totally above the base passions"
Lucifer
"and petty desires that humans fall prey to."
Lucifer
"Oh, my God,"
Lucifer
"is that Michael Voltaggio?"
Lucifer
"You mean Top Chef champion Michael Voltaggio?"
Lucifer
"-Why, yes, it is. -[laughing]"
Lucifer
"-Hello, Michael. -You're Lucifer's sister, right?"
Lucifer
"Oh, my God. Oh, my God."
Lucifer
"Michael, is that really you in the flesh?"
Lucifer
"I mean, you-- I just-- I can't, I just, I--"
Lucifer
"You! [laughs]"
Lucifer
"Your egg yolk gnocchi is divine,"
Lucifer
"and I should know, because I am an angel."
Lucifer
"But you, you are such a bad boy,"
Lucifer
"and I am feeling hungry. [cackles]"
Lucifer
"[laughs] Anyway, Michael, would you excuse us for just a moment?"
Lucifer
"-Sure, I'll just be over at the bar. -[Saraqael] Okay."
Lucifer
"So, I have arranged for you to have the full Volt VIP experience."
Lucifer
"A Friday night reservation for life at Estuary, his new restaurant in DC,"
Lucifer
"Michael's special recipe for rice pilaf, and…"
Lucifer
"-…his personal phone number. -[gasps]"
Lucifer
"In exchange, all I ask is for your support."
Lucifer
"Wow, I mean, I gotta hand it to you, Lucifer."
Lucifer
"It's gonna be really hard to say no after that."
Lucifer
"Excellent. [chuckles]"
Lucifer
"Amazing, thank you."
Lucifer
"[sighs] Well, truth be told, Michael owes me."
Lucifer
"How else do you think he won Top Chef? That squab was inedible."
Lucifer
"But still, I mean, this is a really big favor to ask."
Lucifer
"-Mmm. -[gasps] You must really wanna be God."
Lucifer
"Actually, why do you want it so badly?"
Lucifer
"Um, well, you know,"
Lucifer
"because who-- who wouldn't want it?"
Lucifer
"[chuckles] Right."
Lucifer
"[inhales] You know what? I actually need to think about this a little more."
Lucifer
"-Saraqael, I-- -I should go. [chuckles]"
Lucifer
"[huffs]"
Lucifer
"["Heretic" by Stop Dead playing]"
Lucifer
"♪ I'm a heretic Don't wanna feel any shame ♪"
Lucifer
"♪ I start taking them down And it all goes away ♪"
Lucifer
"♪ Everything is fine… ♪"
Lucifer
"Michael Voltaggio is the worst."
Lucifer
"What are you talking about?"
Lucifer
"My campaign to become God, it's hit another snag. It's a disaster."
Lucifer
"It can't be that bad."
Lucifer
"[Lucifer] Well, at least it's not boring. Unlike this, our final case."
Lucifer
"I mean, how many fences called TJ can there be in Hollywood?"
Lucifer
"We've seen six already."
Lucifer
"Well, we only have five to go, and come on, you're not gonna miss this?"
Lucifer
"-Even a little bit? -I'd rather have a colonoscopy."
Lucifer
"[exhales] Well, for me, it's the shoe leather,"
Lucifer
"the day-to-day chasing down the boring long shots, you know? It's…"
Lucifer
"That's the fun part. I am gonna miss it."
Lucifer
"You know what I am gonna miss? That look in your eyes right now."
Lucifer
"May-- maybe you shouldn't quit."
Lucifer
"What?"
Lucifer
"No, I want to."
Lucifer
"I wanna be with you."
Lucifer
"[exhales]"
Lucifer
"[door creaks]"
Lucifer
"[Chloe] Who leaves their door open in LA?"
Lucifer
"[Lucifer] No one. Lock's broken."
Lucifer
"[scoffs] Hello. Look at all these stolen goodies."
Lucifer
"Oh, looks like we found the right TJ."
Lucifer
"Oh! Vintage Rolex."
Lucifer
"What sort of idiot thief would leave this behind? It's worth a fortune."
Lucifer
"Huh!"
Lucifer
"I bet this boot mark is gonna match the one we found at the wine cellar."
Lucifer
"Well, whoever searched this place"
Lucifer
"was definitely looking for something in particular."
Lucifer
"-I wonder if they found it. -[man] Found what?"
Lucifer
"[Chloe] TJ Ross?"
Lucifer
"Who wants to know?"
Lucifer
"Detective Decker, LAPD. We're here to talk about the death of Jonathan Donnelly."
Lucifer
"Stay away. I-- I don't wanna hurt you."
Lucifer
"You? Hurt us? Adorable. [chuckles]"
Lucifer
"Come along now, TJ."
Lucifer
"[TJ grunts]"
Lucifer
"[exclaims]"
Lucifer
"[groans]"
Lucifer
"[panting]"
Lucifer
"What was that?"
Lucifer
"[Ella] Size 13. Taken from the rubble at TJ Ross' house."
Lucifer
"Bigger than any of his shoes,"
Lucifer
"but it does match the shoe print we found at the wine locker."
Lucifer
"So whoever killed Jonathan Donnelly also ransacked TJ's place?"
Lucifer
"They had to be looking for something Jonathan stole off a corpse."
Lucifer
"Given what was left behind, I'd say they haven't found it yet."
Lucifer
"But what is this object?"
Lucifer
"Who wants it? And why?"
Lucifer
"And where does our killer buy his enormous boots?"
Lucifer
"It's all a mystery, isn't it?"
Lucifer
"A thrilling, tangled web of discovery and contradiction"
Lucifer
"that you two are never gonna see because you're running off to stupid Alabama!"
Lucifer
"She thinks we're going north of Florida. We're definitely not going there."
Lucifer
"-Alabama's actually really nice. -You would think that."
Lucifer
"Okay, everybody. Let's focus on the killer."
Lucifer
"Our priority now is TJ Ross."
Lucifer
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