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Clips from That '70s Show (1998) - The Crunge (S05E05)

"Yeah, I liken your situation to that of Pavlov's dog."
That '70s Show (1998)
"You see, Pavlov was this science guy..."
That '70s Show (1998)
"and every time his dog would ring a bell, Pavlov would eat."
That '70s Show (1998)
"Are you sure it was the dog who rang the bell?"
That '70s Show (1998)
"Yeah. I mean, who else would it be?"
That '70s Show (1998)
"Pavlov?"
That '70s Show (1998)
"Well, that wouldn't be a trick, Eric."
That '70s Show (1998)
"What man can't ring a bell?"
That '70s Show (1998)
"Anyway, every time that dog would ring that bell..."
That '70s Show (1998)
"old Pavlov would eat, and then he would drool."
That '70s Show (1998)
"You just read that chapter two seconds ago."
That '70s Show (1998)
"- Do you even want my help? - No!"
That '70s Show (1998)
"Your loss."
That '70s Show (1998)
"Okay. So what's wrong with you and Donna?"
That '70s Show (1998)
"She did better than me on that test..."
That '70s Show (1998)
"and I'm sorry, but that is just not gonna fly..."
That '70s Show (1998)
"because I am the man and the man's the man, and that's just the way it is."
That '70s Show (1998)
"Well, honey, everybody has different skills."
That '70s Show (1998)
"I do better on tests than your father..."
That '70s Show (1998)
"but he's the one brave enough to kill spiders."
That '70s Show (1998)
"And since we've been married, how many tests have I taken? None."
That '70s Show (1998)
"How many spiders has your father killed?"
That '70s Show (1998)
"Hundreds."
That '70s Show (1998)
"But, Mom, spiders freak me out."
That '70s Show (1998)
"We all have different qualities."
That '70s Show (1998)
"But the thing to remember is how you do on some silly test..."
That '70s Show (1998)
"is much less important than how you behave in real life."
That '70s Show (1998)
"I'll take a dummy over a jackass any day."
That '70s Show (1998)
"Well, honey, right now you're both."
That '70s Show (1998)
"Okay, Steven, about your vision of our future..."
That '70s Show (1998)
"with you swilling beer and me being fat?"
That '70s Show (1998)
"That's not gonna happen, because I'm not gonna be fat."
That '70s Show (1998)
"It's genetic."
That '70s Show (1998)
"That's true."
That '70s Show (1998)
"Her mother drinks two bottles of wine a day..."
That '70s Show (1998)
"and she looks damn good."
That '70s Show (1998)
"No, I've seen her vacuum in her underwear."
That '70s Show (1998)
"- So what's your point? - My point is she's frickin' hot."
That '70s Show (1998)
"Not you."
That '70s Show (1998)
"All I'm saying is that I've become accustomed to a certain lifestyle..."
That '70s Show (1998)
"and if you would just live up to your potential-"
That '70s Show (1998)
"I don't know why you're talking to 950 guy over there."
That '70s Show (1998)
"I got a 1 030. I got 80 more potential."
That '70s Show (1998)
"Yeah, but Steven has my heart-"
That '70s Show (1998)
"Which is why I want him to be rich."
That '70s Show (1998)
"I mean, think about all the stuff you could buy for me."
That '70s Show (1998)
"Jackie..."
That '70s Show (1998)
"why don't you earn your own money and buy those things yourself?"
That '70s Show (1998)
"Myself?"
That '70s Show (1998)
"And I'm not like Forman. I have no problem mooching off your success."
That '70s Show (1998)
"You know, you leave the room, I steal some money from your purse."
That '70s Show (1998)
"You pretend I didn't, but we both know I did."
That '70s Show (1998)
"That's the future I see for us."
That '70s Show (1998)
"Oh, Steven, that's beautiful."
That '70s Show (1998)
"Oh, wait. So you don't even care that I did better than him?"
That '70s Show (1998)
"Not really."
That '70s Show (1998)
"Well, if being smart isn't gonna help me impress the chicks..."
That '70s Show (1998)
"then I want no part of it."
That '70s Show (1998)
"I'm gonna go back to coasting through life on my good looks."
That '70s Show (1998)
"Hey, and my brains will always be there..."
That '70s Show (1998)
"so if I ever need 'em I'll just whip 'em out..."
That '70s Show (1998)
"and use 'em like a secret emergency rocket pack."
That '70s Show (1998)
"That's a good plan, man."
That '70s Show (1998)
"Hey, it beats the hell out of reading."
That '70s Show (1998)
"- Okay, Donna, look. - Don't worry, Eric."
That '70s Show (1998)
"I'm only reading the funnies."
That '70s Show (1998)
"Business section's for the man, right?"
That '70s Show (1998)
"Donna, the thing is, I'm a jackass and I know it."
That '70s Show (1998)
"Well, I know it too."
That '70s Show (1998)
"Look. Okay, the only reason I said what I said is-"
That '70s Show (1998)
"You agreed to marry me before the facts were in, right?"
That '70s Show (1998)
"So now I'm thinking that maybe, you know..."
That '70s Show (1998)
"you might want to trade up."
That '70s Show (1998)
"That's so stupid."
That '70s Show (1998)
"Okay, I swear to God, if one more person calls me stupid today-"
That '70s Show (1998)
"Eric-"
That '70s Show (1998)
"Eric, my entire life..."
That '70s Show (1998)
"everywhere I've gone and everything I've done..."
That '70s Show (1998)
"has been better because you were there with me..."
That '70s Show (1998)
"Wow."
That '70s Show (1998)
"That was amazing."
That '70s Show (1998)
"Did you come up with that yourself?"
That '70s Show (1998)
"Well, I saw Mr. Ingalls say it to Mary on Little House on the Prairie."
That '70s Show (1998)
"- Hmm. - I just made it a test score instead of blindness."
That '70s Show (1998)
"But I- I still think it's true."
That '70s Show (1998)
"So, you're still glad we're engaged?"
That '70s Show (1998)
"Of course."
That '70s Show (1998)
"Good. Hey, speaking of Little House-"
That '70s Show (1998)
"Did you ever see that one where Laura..."
That '70s Show (1998)
"accidentally told Kelso, Hyde, Fez and Jackie that she was engaged to Donna?"
That '70s Show (1998)
"Eric, are you kidding me?"
That '70s Show (1998)
"God. You can't even keep a secret?"
That '70s Show (1998)
"Hey, Donna, I got an 800. We're lucky I can wash myself, okay?"
That '70s Show (1998)
"Poor person! Where's my drink?"
That '70s Show (1998)
"Where's your drink? What about my drink?"
That '70s Show (1998)
"Next time you ask where your drink is, it will be in your ass."
That '70s Show (1998)
"It's so hard to get good poor people these days."
That '70s Show (1998)