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Clips from Cheers - 2 Good 2 Be 4 Real (S04E04)

This is just not Working out.

"This is just not Working out."

Cheers

I'm gonna start Losing customers here.

"I'm gonna start Losing customers here."

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I'm afraid i'm gonna Have to ask you to leave.

"I'm afraid i'm gonna Have to ask you to leave."

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Now, i want you to beat it.

"Now, i want you to beat it."

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Oh, god, Don't tempt me, man.

"Oh, god, Don't tempt me, man."

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Don't tempt me.

"Don't tempt me."

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Sam, is there A problem?

"Sam, is there A problem?"

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Yeah, get him out of here

"Yeah, get him out of here"

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Before there's clown white All over the walls.

"Before there's clown white All over the walls."

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All right, fine. Uh, sotto...

"All right, fine. Uh, sotto..."

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I think my attempt At enlightening sam

"I think my attempt At enlightening sam"

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Has failed.

"Has failed."

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I'm afraid you're Going to have to go.

"I'm afraid you're Going to have to go."

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So i'll see you Tomorrow.

"So i'll see you Tomorrow."

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I know. I know what Will win them over.

"I know. I know what Will win them over."

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Do your robot That winds down.

"Do your robot That winds down."

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Uh-huh.

"Uh-huh."

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Wonderful. You are a master.

"Wonderful. You are a master."

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What control.

"What control."

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Ah, mime-putting.

"Ah, mime-putting."

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Same time tomorrow?

"Same time tomorrow?"

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He spoke. It's a miracle.

"He spoke. It's a miracle."

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Yeah, ok, all right. From now on,

"Yeah, ok, all right. From now on,"

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Nobody works in this bar That wears more make-up Than you do.

"Nobody works in this bar That wears more make-up Than you do."

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All right.

"All right."

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Excuse me. My name Is vinnie claussen.

"Excuse me. My name Is vinnie claussen."

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How do you do?

"How do you do?"

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You don't look like A weasel.

"You don't look like A weasel."

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Thank you. Neither do you.

"Thank you. Neither do you."

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Is carla tortelli here?

"Is carla tortelli here?"

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Oh, just a minute.

"Oh, just a minute."

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Hey, carla... Hmm?

"Hey, carla... Hmm?"

Cheers

Vinnie claussen's Here to see you.

"Vinnie claussen's Here to see you."

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What's he doing here?

"What's he doing here?"

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Well, you better not Watch this, kid.

"Well, you better not Watch this, kid."

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You're about to see A guy's dreams dashed

"You're about to see A guy's dreams dashed"

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On the rocks Of tortelli point.

"On the rocks Of tortelli point."

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Carla? Yep.

"Carla? Yep."

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I-i-i'm vinnie claussen.

"I-i-i'm vinnie claussen."

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Yeah, i know. I got your letter.

"Yeah, i know. I got your letter."

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Already. I was hoping To meet you before you got it.

"Already. I was hoping To meet you before you got it."

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I don't express myself Very well on paper,

"I don't express myself Very well on paper,"

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And it's not The best picture of me.

"And it's not The best picture of me."

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Vinnie, really, I don't wanna See you

"Vinnie, really, I don't wanna See you"

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Making a fool Of yourself

"Making a fool Of yourself"

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In front Of all these people.

"In front Of all these people."

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Fact of the matter is, Someone beat you to me.

"Fact of the matter is, Someone beat you to me."

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Oh, gee, i'm sorry To hear that.

"Oh, gee, i'm sorry To hear that."

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Especially Now that i met you.

"Especially Now that i met you."

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Well, uh, i'd offer her As a consolation prize,

"Well, uh, i'd offer her As a consolation prize,"

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But you're probably sick Of dealing with stiffs.

"But you're probably sick Of dealing with stiffs."

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Well, guess I'll be leaving, then.

"Well, guess I'll be leaving, then."

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Yeah, better luck next time.

"Yeah, better luck next time."

Cheers

Sam.

"Sam."

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Vinnie, let me buy you A drink, would you?

"Vinnie, let me buy you A drink, would you?"

Cheers

Take care of him.

"Take care of him."

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Carla, can i talk to you For a second, please?

"Carla, can i talk to you For a second, please?"

Cheers

So, how long you been Interested in dead guys?

"So, how long you been Interested in dead guys?"

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Uh, listen, before i start, Do me a favor, will you?

"Uh, listen, before i start, Do me a favor, will you?"

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Stick your hands In your pockets

"Stick your hands In your pockets"

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And keep 'em there Until i finish.

"And keep 'em there Until i finish."

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What's going on?

"What's going on?"

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Just humor me, will you?

"Just humor me, will you?"

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Ok, but don't start in on me

"Ok, but don't start in on me"

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About going out With this claussen guy.

"About going out With this claussen guy."

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He's all right, But he's no mitch.

"He's all right, But he's no mitch."

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Listen to me. Mitch doesn't exist.

"Listen to me. Mitch doesn't exist."

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The guys and i made him up.

"The guys and i made him up."

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You what?

"You what?"

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You were so depressed,

"You were so depressed,"

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We figured we had To do something,

"We figured we had To do something,"

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So we made the guy up, Wrote the letters,

"So we made the guy up, Wrote the letters,"

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And rented a post office box For you to write to him.

"And rented a post office box For you to write to him."

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Ow! Damn. Ow. I forgot the feet.

"Ow! Damn. Ow. I forgot the feet."

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You are scum. You are the scum That scum scrapes off

"You are scum. You are the scum That scum scrapes off"

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The bottom of their shoes.

"The bottom of their shoes."

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You're always looking at the Negative side to everything.

"You're always looking at the Negative side to everything."

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I hate your guts. I hate every one of you.

"I hate your guts. I hate every one of you."

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Why did you do this? What was it, some big laugh?

"Why did you do this? What was it, some big laugh?"

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You wanted to see me Get all moony-eyed,

"You wanted to see me Get all moony-eyed,"

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And then yank the rug out.

"And then yank the rug out."

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You get a big laugh There, huh, huh? No?

"You get a big laugh There, huh, huh? No?"

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Then what did you do it for?

"Then what did you do it for?"

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What did you think Was gonna come of this?

"What did you think Was gonna come of this?"

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We had that covered. We weren't gonna Let you get hurt.

"We had that covered. We weren't gonna Let you get hurt."

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When it came time To meet the guy,

"When it came time To meet the guy,"

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We were gonna have The plane go down In the south pacific.

"We were gonna have The plane go down In the south pacific."

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Ow!

"Ow!"

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[Lady screams]

"[Lady screams]"

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Sorry.

"Sorry."

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Hey, just Drop dead twice.

"Hey, just Drop dead twice."

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Carla, wait. Wait. Now, there's Something you don't understand.

"Carla, wait. Wait. Now, there's Something you don't understand."

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What they did was imbecilic, Moronic, and ill-conceived.

"What they did was imbecilic, Moronic, and ill-conceived."

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That's the way. Sugarcoat it.

"That's the way. Sugarcoat it."

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But it was not done to make you The butt of a joke.

"But it was not done to make you The butt of a joke."

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It was done because your friends Saw their dear friend hurting,

"It was done because your friends Saw their dear friend hurting,"

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And they wanted to help.

"And they wanted to help."

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Now, you can either Walk out of here angrily,

"Now, you can either Walk out of here angrily,"

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Or you can trust your friends And forgive them...

"Or you can trust your friends And forgive them..."

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And take advantage Of the opportunity Seated at the bar.

"And take advantage Of the opportunity Seated at the bar."

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Why don't you give The guy a chance?

"Why don't you give The guy a chance?"

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I mean, He answered your ad. He's dying to date you.

"I mean, He answered your ad. He's dying to date you."

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Hey, where do you Think you're going?

"Hey, where do you Think you're going?"

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Oh, i finished my drink.

"Oh, i finished my drink."

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Sit down!

"Sit down!"

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Nice touch. Nice touch.

"Nice touch. Nice touch."

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Does this mean you're Gonna go out with him?

"Does this mean you're Gonna go out with him?"

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I'm thinking about it.

"I'm thinking about it."

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Actually, in a dimly-lit bar,

"Actually, in a dimly-lit bar,"

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He's not the worst thing I've ever seen.

"He's not the worst thing I've ever seen."

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Writes a good letter.

"Writes a good letter."

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Probably give him As big a thrill

"Probably give him As big a thrill"

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As this mitch guy Was giving me.

"As this mitch guy Was giving me."

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Get out of here.

"Get out of here."

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What do you say?

"What do you say?"

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Oh, all right, You're off the hook.

"Oh, all right, You're off the hook."

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Just tell me one thing--

"Just tell me one thing--"

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Who wrote all those lovey parts?

"Who wrote all those lovey parts?"

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Oh, that was my department.

"Oh, that was my department."

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You did a real good job.

"You did a real good job."

Cheers

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