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Clips from The World's End

Just trust me.

"Just trust me."

The World's End

So, Mr. Page, what brings you to Newton Haven?

"So, Mr. Page, what brings you to Newton Haven?"

The World's End

Well, we're all from here. We're just back to see the sights.

"Well, we're all from here. We're just back to see the sights."

The World's End

Have a crack at the old Golden Mile.

"Have a crack at the old Golden Mile."

The World's End

Might get a bit messy.

"Might get a bit messy."

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Well, you make sure you get that brake light fixed

"Well, you make sure you get that brake light fixed"

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and you might want to do an emissions test, too.

"and you might want to do an emissions test, too."

The World's End

Oh, and, Peter.

"Oh, and, Peter."

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Don't make too much mess.

"Don't make too much mess."

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We won't!

"We won't!"

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Hmm.

"Hmm."

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I don't understand.

"I don't understand."

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It's simple, Pete.

"It's simple, Pete."

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The car's still registered to you, it has been since 1989.

"The car's still registered to you, it has been since 1989."

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But I've moved three times since then.

"But I've moved three times since then."

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I know, I changed the log book.

"I know, I changed the log book."

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Where do you think all those points came from?

"Where do you think all those points came from?"

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Jesus. You guys need to relax.

"Jesus. You guys need to relax."

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Do you know how much trouble you could get into?

"Do you know how much trouble you could get into?"

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Do you know how much trouble I'm already in?

"Do you know how much trouble I'm already in?"

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What's that supposed to mean?

"What's that supposed to mean?"

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Hey. What the hell is this? Why are we even here?

"Hey. What the hell is this? Why are we even here?"

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We are here to get annihilated.

"We are here to get annihilated."

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Have you got any plans for dinner at all?

"Have you got any plans for dinner at all?"

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Tonight, we will be partaking of a liquid repast

"Tonight, we will be partaking of a liquid repast"

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as we wend our way up The Golden Mile.

"as we wend our way up The Golden Mile."

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Commencing with an inaugural tankard at The First Post,

"Commencing with an inaugural tankard at The First Post,"

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then onto The Old Familiar, The Famous Cock, The Cross Hands,

"then onto The Old Familiar, The Famous Cock, The Cross Hands,"

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The Good Companions, The Trusty Servant,

"The Good Companions, The Trusty Servant,"

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The Two Headed Dog, The Mermaid, The Beehive, The King's Head

"The Two Headed Dog, The Mermaid, The Beehive, The King's Head"

The World's End

and The Hole in the Wall for a measure of the same.

"and The Hole in the Wall for a measure of the same."

The World's End

All before the last bittersweet pint in that most fateful terminus,

"All before the last bittersweet pint in that most fateful terminus,"

The World's End

The World's End.

"The World's End."

The World's End

Leave a light on, good lady,

"Leave a light on, good lady,"

The World's End

for though we may return with a twinkle in our eyes,

"for though we may return with a twinkle in our eyes,"

The World's End

we will, in truth, be blind drunk.

"we will, in truth, be blind drunk."

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Come on!

"Come on!"

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Until 1840... Fucking hell.

"Until 1840... Fucking hell."

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...this building was the site of Newton Haven's first post office.

"...this building was the site of Newton Haven's first post office."

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Until an enterprising business fellow decided that

"Until an enterprising business fellow decided that"

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far from befitting the sending and receiving of mail

"far from befitting the sending and receiving of mail"

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it was perhaps better suited as a humble taproom

"it was perhaps better suited as a humble taproom"

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where a weary traveler might get Matted. Come on.

"where a weary traveler might get Matted. Come on."

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Ah!

"Ah!"

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It's like déjà vu.

"It's like déjà vu."

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I don't remember this at all. Has it been refurbished?

"I don't remember this at all. Has it been refurbished?"

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Been bought by a chain, hasn't it?

"Been bought by a chain, hasn't it?"

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Part of that nationwide initiative to rob

"Part of that nationwide initiative to rob"

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small, charming pubs of any discernible character.

"small, charming pubs of any discernible character."

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Starbucking, man. It's happening everywhere.

"Starbucking, man. It's happening everywhere."

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Can't take away that smell, though.

"Can't take away that smell, though."

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I'm sure they tried.

"I'm sure they tried."

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Good evening, Raymondo. The prodigal sons return. Eh?

"Good evening, Raymondo. The prodigal sons return. Eh?"

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Who's on the guest list tonight?

"Who's on the guest list tonight?"

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Come again? The guest ales.

"Come again? The guest ales."

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We, sir, are doing The Golden Mile and you have

"We, sir, are doing The Golden Mile and you have"

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the honor of drawing first blood.

"the honor of drawing first blood."

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What do you recommend? There's one. Crowning Glory.

"What do you recommend? There's one. Crowning Glory."

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Rather fitting. How's that?

"Rather fitting. How's that?"

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I'm Gary King. What?

"I'm Gary King. What?"

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So tell me more. About what?

"So tell me more. About what?"

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Crowning Glory. Is it nutty? Is it foamy? Is it happy?

"Crowning Glory. Is it nutty? Is it foamy? Is it happy?"

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Does it have a surprisingly fruity note which lingers on the tongue?

"Does it have a surprisingly fruity note which lingers on the tongue?"

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Hmm. It's beer. Hmm.

"Hmm. It's beer. Hmm."

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We'll have five of those, please.

"We'll have five of those, please."

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No. Sorry. Can we have four of those and a tap water, please?

"No. Sorry. Can we have four of those and a tap water, please?"

The World's End

What?

"What?"

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I don't believe this,

"I don't believe this,"

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a man of your legendary prowess drinking fucking rain.

"a man of your legendary prowess drinking fucking rain."

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It's like seeing a lion eating some hummus.

"It's like seeing a lion eating some hummus."

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That doesn't make any sense. I know it doesn't make any sense.

"That doesn't make any sense. I know it doesn't make any sense."

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You seriously have a problem with me not drinking, after what happened?

"You seriously have a problem with me not drinking, after what happened?"

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I don't, but King Arthur does! Oh, this'll be good.

"I don't, but King Arthur does! Oh, this'll be good."

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What's King Arthur got to do with it?

"What's King Arthur got to do with it?"

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Do you honestly think that King Arthur came back from the Battle of Hastings,

"Do you honestly think that King Arthur came back from the Battle of Hastings,"

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fucking rocked up at Arthur's Castle... Camelot.

"fucking rocked up at Arthur's Castle... Camelot."

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...walked up to the bar and went,

"...walked up to the bar and went,"

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"Hello. Could I have a tap water?"

""Hello. Could I have a tap water?""

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No, because they didn't have running water in Arthurian times.

"No, because they didn't have running water in Arthurian times."

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Exactly. He would have had a mead. The King Arthur of beers.

"Exactly. He would have had a mead. The King Arthur of beers."

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And I'm less of a man because I choose to drink water?

"And I'm less of a man because I choose to drink water?"

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Well, it's a bit "ooh ducky", innit?

"Well, it's a bit "ooh ducky", innit?"

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That's not very PC, Gary.

"That's not very PC, Gary."

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Get out of the '90s, Pete.

"Get out of the '90s, Pete."

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There's nothing "ooh ducky" about being teetotal,

"There's nothing "ooh ducky" about being teetotal,"

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about walking into a pub after a rugby match

"about walking into a pub after a rugby match"

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and ordering a tap water at a bar packed full of big ugly bastards wearing warpaint.

"and ordering a tap water at a bar packed full of big ugly bastards wearing warpaint."

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That, my friend, takes confidence, yeah? I'm talking balls.

"That, my friend, takes confidence, yeah? I'm talking balls."

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You said it, poof.

"You said it, poof."

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I don't know if you're aware of this, Gary, but we are not teenagers anymore.

"I don't know if you're aware of this, Gary, but we are not teenagers anymore."

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And God forbid you ever have children, because if...

"And God forbid you ever have children, because if..."

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I might have kids.

"I might have kids."

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Then you had better be ready to take responsibility...

"Then you had better be ready to take responsibility..."

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No. I mean I might have kids.

"No. I mean I might have kids."

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You remember Karen Eggerton, who I fucked?

"You remember Karen Eggerton, who I fucked?"

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She was two weeks late when her parents emigrated to Normandy.

"She was two weeks late when her parents emigrated to Normandy."

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I never heard from her again. She might have had a baby.

"I never heard from her again. She might have had a baby."

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Imagine that? A French kid.

"Imagine that? A French kid."

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It's pointless arguing with you.

"It's pointless arguing with you."

The World's End

To kids. Wherever they may be.

"To kids. Wherever they may be."

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Kids. Kids.

"Kids. Kids."

The World's End

Drink up. Let's Boo-Boo.

"Drink up. Let's Boo-Boo."

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"Boo-Boo". What is that?

""Boo-Boo". What is that?"

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You remember, "Let's Boo-Boo."

"You remember, "Let's Boo-Boo.""

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You know, from Mr. Shepherd's classroom, it said on the wall,

"You know, from Mr. Shepherd's classroom, it said on the wall,"

The World's End

"Exit, pursued by a bear," you know, from that Shakespeare play?

""Exit, pursued by a bear," you know, from that Shakespeare play?"

The World's End

A Winter's Tale. Yeah. What was it called?

"A Winter's Tale. Yeah. What was it called?"

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A Winter's Tale. That's it.

"A Winter's Tale. That's it."

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And if we needed to make a quick getaway, we'd say, "Exit, pursued by a bear,"

"And if we needed to make a quick getaway, we'd say, "Exit, pursued by a bear,""

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and then it was, "Exit, pursued by Yogi Bear,"

"and then it was, "Exit, pursued by Yogi Bear,""

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and then it was just, "Let's Yogi and Boo-Boo,"

"and then it was just, "Let's Yogi and Boo-Boo,""

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and then, "Let's Boo-Boo."

"and then, "Let's Boo-Boo.""

The World's End

So you're saying we should go? Yeah. it's shit here, innit?

"So you're saying we should go? Yeah. it's shit here, innit?"

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Ah!

"Ah!"

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The Old Familiar. Now this is a pub.

"The Old Familiar. Now this is a pub."

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Yes. This is more like it.

"Yes. This is more like it."

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Like déjà vu.

"Like déjà vu."

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David, my man, have you heard the news? Gary King is back in town.

"David, my man, have you heard the news? Gary King is back in town."

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Who's he?

"Who's he?"

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How was the funeral, Gary?

"How was the funeral, Gary?"

The World's End

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