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Clips from Weeds - Head Cheese (S04E04)

"I don't know."
Weeds
"My mom hit me."
Weeds
"You told your mom?"
Weeds
"Have I taught you nothing?"
Weeds
"Tell her what she wants to hear, then do what you want."
Weeds
"How's your mom doing in rehab?"
Weeds
"Fine, I guess."
Weeds
"I can't visit till she's detoxed."
Weeds
"Where'd she get the coke?"
Weeds
"- Probably the maternity front. - What?"
Weeds
"- You're kidding, right? - No."
Weeds
"My mom was in jail, and then suddenly she's free and working for your mom."
Weeds
"- Retail. - You think my mom's dealing cocaine?"
Weeds
"I think they're both dealing, but your mom's a control freak..."
Weeds
"...and mine's weak and addiction-prone."
Weeds
"Good times, huh?"
Weeds
"How great would it be if we were both 18?"
Weeds
"- So you gonna dump them? - Why?"
Weeds
"Because the slap-happy drug dealer told me to?"
Weeds
"Screw that."
Weeds
"Simone, Harmony. This is Izzy."
Weeds
"- Does she party? - Does she party?"
Weeds
"Depends on the party."
Weeds
"Are you sure there is no border patrol here?"
Weeds
"As long as you don't walk out of the surf with 10 wet Mexicans..."
Weeds
"...you'll be fine."
Weeds
"So Andy tells me you grew up in an orphanage."
Weeds
"I prefer not to talk about it."
Weeds
"Then what should we talk about?"
Weeds
"We should talk about you."
Weeds
"I grew up in the valley. Married my high school sweetheart."
Weeds
"- It didn't really work out. - Divorced?"
Weeds
"No. Not yet."
Weeds
"- You are married? - Just technically."
Weeds
"Gotta sign the papers."
Weeds
"Well, why do you not sign them?"
Weeds
"I'm on the run, but it's nothing. Just a little embezzlement."
Weeds
"- You steal? - Borrow."
Weeds
"I was gonna pay it back."
Weeds
"- When? - Someday."
Weeds
"Hey, what the heck? You wrecked our castle."
Weeds
"It wasn't a castle. It was a lump of sand."
Weeds
"You're a bad man."
Weeds
"You're a bad castle-builder."
Weeds
"Little shit."
Weeds
"You do not like children?"
Weeds
"I like my four."
Weeds
"Well, three of them."
Weeds
"You have four children? When do you see them?"
Weeds
"When I can trust they won't tell my cunt ex-wife where I am."
Weeds
"- What's the matter? - Oh, I am not feeling so well."
Weeds
"Perhaps we should stop talking."
Weeds
"Okay. Cool with that."
Weeds
"Let the silence bring us closer. Yeah, I can dig it."
Weeds
"I was weak. I was dishonest."
Weeds
"I let the plane fly me."
Weeds
"If it wasn't for Celia Hodes, I'd be back in the air in 30 days..."
Weeds
"...snorting lines off the dashboard and jamming blow up my urethra..."
Weeds
"...so I could fuck Paula, the 57-year-old flight attendant."
Weeds
"I wanna apologize to you, Celia."
Weeds
"Yes. Yes."
Weeds
"Thank you, Barry, for your share."
Weeds
"We're all like one big...."
Weeds
"...wonderful, dysfunctional family, and I love you guys."
Weeds
"We're all working through it."
Weeds
"Together."
Weeds
"I mean, I never really had a family."
Weeds
"I mean, I have a family, but they're not like you guys."
Weeds
"It's okay."
Weeds
"Celia, can we borrow you for just a minute?"
Weeds
"Yeah, sure."
Weeds
"Celia, hurry back, okay?"
Weeds
"Because I need you. You know, everybody needs you."
Weeds
"We ran your insurance info a few times, and it's not exactly accurate."
Weeds
"What seems to be the problem?"
Weeds
"You don't have any."
Weeds
"The policy number you gave us..."
Weeds
"...belongs to an individual who is deceased."
Weeds
"And Korean."
Weeds
"Listen."
Weeds
"This is going really well, and I'm only on my second step."
Weeds
"I am so proud of me."
Weeds
"We're proud too."
Weeds
"We have no intention of abandoning you."
Weeds
"Our sister facility across town has a bed available..."
Weeds
"...and they're holding it just for you."
Weeds
"I belong here."
Weeds
"Barry needs me."
Weeds
"Don't you have a work program?"
Weeds
"- I could do dishes, landscaping. - I'm sorry, Celia."
Weeds
"What we pay our help in a year won't cover a week here."
Weeds
"Discharge paperwork is in the folder. I'll need your signature on all pages."
Weeds
"And you can drop it at the front desk on your way out."
Weeds
"Best of luck with your recovery."
Weeds
"We're going to need your room vacant within the hour."
Weeds
"Hola, Maria."
Weeds
"Doug around?"
Weeds
"He go to buy some mouthwash, some toilet paper and some tweezers."
Weeds
"Oh, cool."
Weeds
"Right."
Weeds
"So how's it going?"
Weeds
"Things with Doug."
Weeds
"- Okay. - Just okay?"
Weeds
"No."
Weeds
"He is a terrible man."
Weeds
"What?"
Weeds
"Doug? Come on."
Weeds
"He's a great guy."
Weeds
"- He is a criminal. - He's an accountant."
Weeds
"A thief who has abandoned his wife and family..."
Weeds
"...and wants to make me his whore."
Weeds
"A CPA with legal problems, who's going through a divorce..."
Weeds
"...and is wildly in love with you."
Weeds
"He has warts on his genitals."
Weeds
"Yeah, I got nothing for that."
Weeds
"Please, Andy, help me."
Weeds
"These are for you, my love."
Weeds
"Oh, Maria."
Weeds
"Look how thoughtful he is."
Weeds
"This is a good man."
Weeds
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