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Clips from The Goldbergs - 12 Tapes for a Penny (S03E03)

"Thought you might like to load up on some meat and cheese"
The Goldbergs
"before an active day in the hot sun."
The Goldbergs
"You're a fan, right, Bill?"
The Goldbergs
"Of Geno's cheesesteaks. You bought Pat's."
The Goldbergs
"Why not just punch me in the face?"
The Goldbergs
"Aren't they directly across the street from each other"
The Goldbergs
"with the exact same ingredients?"
The Goldbergs
"Go on, punch my face. Do it."
The Goldbergs
"Or we go to the eagles-cowboys game."
The Goldbergs
"50-yard line, root for America's team?"
The Goldbergs
"I thought you were a diehard Eagles fan."
The Goldbergs
"Until I discovered the Cowboys,"
The Goldbergs
"my other favorite team, which happens to be yours."
The Goldbergs
"You're gonna turn on the Eagles just like that?"
The Goldbergs
"Son, don't you have any spine at all?"
The Goldbergs
"No. But you know what I do have?"
The Goldbergs
"Matching bucket hats!"
The Goldbergs
"Why? Oh, no."
The Goldbergs
"'Cause you love Bob Denver."
The Goldbergs
"You know, Gilligan, from the island."
The Goldbergs
"What? He's my favorite, too."
The Goldbergs
"I don't like Bob Denver. I like John Denver."
The Goldbergs
"Is there a difference? Oh, no."
The Goldbergs
"Yes, one is folk icon who melts my heart."
The Goldbergs
"The other is a scrawny weirdo"
The Goldbergs
"who couldn't close with Ginger or Mary Ann."
The Goldbergs
"(LAUGHS) I totally know the difference."
The Goldbergs
"I'm just busting chops."
The Goldbergs
"I just got you this hat so your head won't burn."
The Goldbergs
"Are you calling me bald?"
The Goldbergs
"No, you have a beautiful head of hair."
The Goldbergs
"On the sides."
The Goldbergs
"You look like a judge."
The Goldbergs
"Well, it's almost tee time."
The Goldbergs
"Come on, Barry. You're gonna come with us today."
The Goldbergs
"He is? I am?"
The Goldbergs
"Yeah, I invited the boy to join us."
The Goldbergs
"You did? You did?"
The Goldbergs
"Yeah, Barry and I play golf all the time."
The Goldbergs
"It's our thing."
The Goldbergs
"I've never golfed with you, not once."
The Goldbergs
"Moron, I'm doing you a solid."
The Goldbergs
"Don't blow this."
The Goldbergs
"My dad did Barry the rare solid."
The Goldbergs
"Now, all Barry had to do was drive it home with Bill."
The Goldbergs
"Ah, golf. The sport of kings."
The Goldbergs
"And queens, equal rights."
The Goldbergs
"(CHUCKLES) I respect your foxy daughter."
The Goldbergs
"No, not foxy, she's an uggo to me."
The Goldbergs
"Not everyone else."
The Goldbergs
"They all think she has an awesome, plump butt."
The Goldbergs
"What the (BLEEP), man?"
The Goldbergs
"Okay, you're trying way too hard."
The Goldbergs
"I get it, be myself."
The Goldbergs
"No, don't do that either."
The Goldbergs
"Wild Bill!"
The Goldbergs
"You need a caddy? There he is."
The Goldbergs
"Anthony Balsamo's here?"
The Goldbergs
"I can't compete with him. He's a total babe."
The Goldbergs
"Relax, you're playing golf with Bill."
The Goldbergs
"He's just the caddy. You're right."
The Goldbergs
"He's the caddy, the guy behind the guy."
The Goldbergs
"He's the one in Bill's ear whispering sweet advice."
The Goldbergs
"That's what I got to do. Not what I meant."
The Goldbergs
"Hey, pretty boy. Take a lap, I got this."
The Goldbergs
"Just give me a sec. I'll catch up."
The Goldbergs
"Hey, I got a package for Lucky Goldberg."
The Goldbergs
"Gonna need your signature."
The Goldbergs
"Yeah, Lucky's a dog."
The Goldbergs
"Then I don't know what to do."
The Goldbergs
"Please don't slam the door."
The Goldbergs
"The nerve of that Erica."
The Goldbergs
"First she frames her brother,"
The Goldbergs
"and then she ropes in our sweet little puppy."
The Goldbergs
"You're not cut out for a life of crime."
The Goldbergs
"You're just a cockapoo."
The Goldbergs
"I ordered the tapes."
The Goldbergs
"I mean, it's like that girl doesn't ever hear a word I say."
The Goldbergs
"I ordered the tapes."
The Goldbergs
"She's my daughter."
The Goldbergs
"How come she refuses to listen to me?"
The Goldbergs
"My God, woman. I ordered the damn tapes."
The Goldbergs
"I saw Adam do it, and I wanted in."
The Goldbergs
"Wait. It was you?"
The Goldbergs
"With that, my mom finally realized"
The Goldbergs
"she did blame Erica for everything,"
The Goldbergs
"even when she was clearly innocent."
The Goldbergs
"Uh, Mom?"
The Goldbergs
"It's for you. Erica's in mall jail."
The Goldbergs
"And two seconds later, Erica was back to being guilty."
The Goldbergs
"I stole something else, but you're never gonna find it."
The Goldbergs
"Your friend's weird."
The Goldbergs
"(SIGHS) There you are."
The Goldbergs
"Classic Erica."
The Goldbergs
"You know, I actually started to think"
The Goldbergs
"maybe I'd been too hard on you, and then you go and shoplift?"
The Goldbergs
"And the worst thing is I'm not even surprised."
The Goldbergs
"Actually, your daughter didn't do anything wrong."
The Goldbergs
"I was just having her stick around"
The Goldbergs
"because this one is freaking me out."
The Goldbergs
"It's true."
The Goldbergs
"Erica tried to talk me out of it, and I didn't listen."
The Goldbergs
"Oh, God, my stomach's in knots."
The Goldbergs
"Can I use the bathroom?"
The Goldbergs
"This way."
The Goldbergs
"Accusing Erica yet again didn't help matters."
The Goldbergs
"Luckily, my mom had a way with words."
The Goldbergs
"So..."
The Goldbergs
"Honest mistake, you know?"
The Goldbergs
"Pedicures, my treat?"
The Goldbergs
"You know, you made me feel like such a bad person"
The Goldbergs
"that I actually thought about stealing."
The Goldbergs
"Schmoo, I'm sorry--"
The Goldbergs
"I don't want to hear you're sorry ever again."
The Goldbergs
"No matter what I do,"
The Goldbergs
"you're always gonna expect the worst from me."
The Goldbergs
"You have no idea how hard that is coming from you."
The Goldbergs
"No idea."
The Goldbergs
"CARLA: You'll never catch me, mall hog!"
The Goldbergs
"I feel so alive!"
The Goldbergs
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