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Clips from Lucifer - Anything Pierce Can Do I Can Do Better (S03E03)

"I walk around with a prosthetic every day"
Lucifer
"covering my real leg."
Lucifer
"Polypropylene."
Lucifer
"Oh. So is that why Reina left the show?"
Lucifer
"She found out you were a fraud?"
Lucifer
"No, she quit because I accused her of blackmailing me."
Lucifer
"I was sent an e-mail"
Lucifer
"with a video that exposed me..."
Lucifer
"you know, with two working legs..."
Lucifer
"said that if I gave Reina a job, the video would disappear."
Lucifer
"So I did."
Lucifer
"But she didn't send it?"
Lucifer
"Apparently not,"
Lucifer
"even though it was sent from her e-mail address,"
Lucifer
"because when I confronted her, she went ballistic."
Lucifer
"Said that she didn't need any handouts and quit right there."
Lucifer
"But if she didn't blackmail you, then who did?"
Lucifer
"Beats me."
Lucifer
"Right. Well, you better not be pulling our legs."
Lucifer
"What are you doing here, Charlotte?"
Lucifer
"Isn't it obvious?"
Lucifer
"I'm a terrible person that's..."
Lucifer
"that's led a terrible life, so I'm..."
Lucifer
"I'm preparing myself for damnation."
Lucifer
"In a three-star hotel?"
Lucifer
"It's what I deserve."
Lucifer
"Well, it's time to sober up."
Lucifer
"I need your help with a legal matter."
Lucifer
"Don't you want to ask someone less damned?"
Lucifer
"I don't think so."
Lucifer
"I need to find a way to prove"
Lucifer
"that Lieutenant Pierce is the criminal mastermind"
Lucifer
"also known as the Sinnerman."
Lucifer
"Say again?"
Lucifer
"Lieutenant Pierce has been leading a double life"
Lucifer
"for quite some time now."
Lucifer
"I need to prove it,"
Lucifer
"and then I need get him out of the picture"
Lucifer
"so that Lucifer can be with Chloe."
Lucifer
"I'm gonna need a little bit more information."
Lucifer
"A very long time ago,"
Lucifer
"God tasked me with blessing a couple with a miracle child."
Lucifer
"Now, that child became Chloe Decker,"
Lucifer
"who, it appears,"
Lucifer
"was placed on this Earth"
Lucifer
"to cross paths with Lucifer."
Lucifer
"Now, since Lucifer is my test,"
Lucifer
"bringing those two together must be my final task."
Lucifer
"At which point,"
Lucifer
"hopefully I'll be restored in my Father's eyes."
Lucifer
"Okay, let me see if I understand this correctly."
Lucifer
"I help you,"
Lucifer
"I help enact God's will?"
Lucifer
"In a way, yes."
Lucifer
"And could that..."
Lucifer
"put me in His good graces as well?"
Lucifer
"Maybe."
Lucifer
"Good enough."
Lucifer
"I'm in."
Lucifer
"And I think I know how to get started."
Lucifer
"Well, I'd say that was rather impressive, wouldn't you?"
Lucifer
"I exposed a fraud of a man and got us a lead."
Lucifer
"It's like the whole world is pointing towards,"
Lucifer
"well, me, today."
Lucifer
"Yes, Lucifer,"
Lucifer
"very impressive."
Lucifer
"Unfortunately, until cyber traces"
Lucifer
"this blackmail e-mail,"
Lucifer
"we have nothing to do tonight."
Lucifer
"Oh, nonsense, nonsense. The night's still young."
Lucifer
"Why don't we, um, I don't know,"
Lucifer
"- go for a drive? - For a drive?"
Lucifer
"What are we, 80? Why would we go for a dri..."
Lucifer
"Ta-da!"
Lucifer
"I mean, it's not flowers, but"
Lucifer
"it does go zero to 60 in, well... fast."
Lucifer
"You..."
Lucifer
"- You got me a car? - Mm-hmm."
Lucifer
"Wait, do you think this is some sort of competition?"
Lucifer
"Of course. If it isn't painfully obvious,"
Lucifer
"anything Pierce can do, I can do better."
Lucifer
"It's not about stuff, Lucifer."
Lucifer
"Thanks anyhow."
Lucifer
"Good morning."
Lucifer
"Good morning?"
Lucifer
"Last I checked, didn't you move out?"
Lucifer
"It's mea culpa time."
Lucifer
"I came to earn my way back"
Lucifer
"into the house."
Lucifer
"Really? And how do you plan on doing that?"
Lucifer
"Well, I tried to think of something nice,"
Lucifer
"but that's not really my strong suit."
Lucifer
"But then I heard you and Pierce broke up."
Lucifer
"So, I figured he hurt you."
Lucifer
"Maybe I just hurt him back?"
Lucifer
"Thanks, but-but no."
Lucifer
"I mean, at least not yet."
Lucifer
"Ah."
Lucifer
"Men are so fricking confusing."
Lucifer
"Yeah, they're dumb. Really dumb."
Lucifer
"Mm-hmm."
Lucifer
"What happened?"
Lucifer
"Well..."
Lucifer
"one minute, things with Marcus are great."
Lucifer
"- Mm-hmm. - And then the next,"
Lucifer
"he ends things, and, uh..."
Lucifer
"And now he's doing all of these..."
Lucifer
"really, really sweet things to win me back."
Lucifer
"And it does seem really nice,"
Lucifer
"but I just don't know if I can trust it."
Lucifer
"I don't know, ho..."
Lucifer
"how do you know if you can trust people?"
Lucifer
"It's simple. I can't."
Lucifer
"People will always let you down."
Lucifer
"You know what I do trust? Pain."
Lucifer
"And I admit,"
Lucifer
"Pierce is in a whole lot of it."
Lucifer
"What? How do you know that?"
Lucifer
"Well, I may have already gone to his house to kick his ass"
Lucifer
"before it occurred to me I should probably"
Lucifer
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