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Clips from The Mindy Project - You've Got Sext (S02E02)

"I'm sorry. Sorry."
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"Ah, Danny. What am I gonna do?"
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"If I had a boyfriend or a husband,"
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"he would have come and picked me up tonight"
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"and I wouldn't be in this situation."
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"I'm never gonna find anyone."
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"I just hope my parents don't mind"
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"that our blood line is gonna die with me."
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"Family's so important to us."
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"What about your brother, Rishi?"
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"Yes, yeah. Yeah, yeah."
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"Forgot about him. I forgot about him."
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"Yeah, you did."
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"(Woman on television) I just threw up in my mouth a little bit."
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"[Both laughing]"
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"You know, that happened to me once, for real."
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"Green key weekend, Junior year."
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"Oh, my... I aspirated on my own vomit."
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"Chris farley appeared to me and said,"
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"it's not your time yet."
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"Oh, my God."
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"Yeah, I know... Whoa."
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"[Phone buzzing]"
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"My butt is buzzing."
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"What are you talking about?"
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"What is this?"
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"We got a padded bra, men's deodorant..."
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"Rape whistle,"
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"plastic bag labeled emergency underwear."
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"Oh, my God. This is Dr. L's bag."
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"You shouldn't go through her stuff."
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"Yeah, no, no, no, you're..."
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"Oh, dude. She's got texts."
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"Yeah, let's go through it."
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"That's from cliff."
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"[Classical music playing]"
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"♪"
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"I knew it! I knew cliff was into Dr. L."
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"Wow."
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"She'll just text him back tomorrow."
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"What? No, no, no."
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"You got to text him back right now."
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"[Laughs] No, no, no, no..."
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"Yes. If a girl doesn't respond to me immediately,"
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"that means she's either stuck up, dead, or living"
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"in an elevator... all three of which are deal breakers."
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"[Sighs] Okay."
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"[Sighs]"
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"[Laughs]"
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"That is such a quick reply."
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"Your competence is a double-edged sword?"
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"This nerd is horned up."
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"All right."
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"(Danny) It's so much better being single."
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"No commitment, no long hair in the drain."
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"No finding my toothbrush wet because someone used it"
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"and thought I wouldn't notice."
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"But Danny, if you rinse a toothbrush"
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"after you use it, it's like no one used it."
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"What about you?"
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"You're always crushing on some cheeseball."
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"Well, there is someone, but..."
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"But what? Who's the next victim?"
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"I feel a little weird telling you, actually."
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"'Cause we work in the same place"
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"and he's out of my league."
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"He'd never be interested in me."
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"Morgan thinks we'd be great together,"
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"but whenever we see each other, we fight and argue."
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"It doesn't matter. Let's just go to your place."
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"I'm cold, Danny."
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"Yeah."
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"Oh, boy..."
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"[Sniffs]"
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"Danny, you smell good. Is that cologne?"
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"What? No. No, no, no."
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"I don't smell good."
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"It's deodorant. Whatever. Leave me alone."
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"Danny?"
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"Hey! Oh, my God."
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"It's my crazy neighbor. I hooked up with her."
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"She's obsessed with me."
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"Do me a favor, hold my hand, okay?"
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"You want me to pretend to be your girlfriend?"
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"No... um, yeah. No!"
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"Yeah... I mean, just for a second."
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"Okay."
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"Hey! Hi. Hi..."
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"I feel like you've been avoiding me."
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"Did you lose your phone?"
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"Your computer?"
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"Your ability to hear your doorbell?"
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"No. He found true love."
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"With his fiancee, which is me."
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"[Phone beeps]"
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"Oh, whoa. Gee, he's fast."
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"Oh, he's answering a question with a question."
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"He's into her. Watch this."
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"[Chuckles]"
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"Ah, that's good. Now, put a winky face on it."
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"Are you kidding me? A winky face?"
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"That's like emoji porn."
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"Yeah, that's the point."
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"Get to texting. Winky face. Winky face."
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"Winky face. Perfect."
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"(Mindy) Winky face."
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"No way."
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"(Cliff) Winky face."
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"Winky face!"
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"[Both laughing]"
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"(Amy) So you're engaged."
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"How long have you guys been together then?"
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"Short version? We met in St. Barths."
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"We met through mutual friends at the resort's"
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"communal dining table."
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"First night, we wanted to kill each other."
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"Second night, I told the maitre D',"
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"seat me anywhere except next to this jerk."
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"Call it fate,"
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"but that night, we fell in love."
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