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Clips from What We Do in the Shadows - The Casino (S03E03)

"right now, I'm going"
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"to empty all of you of your lives!"
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"Kill you! Kill you dead!"
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"That's right. [whimpers]"
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"Uh..."
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"Just do it. She's... not well."
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"- Yeah. - Here you go, sugar. - NADJA: My sweet maraschino"
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"- cherry babies. - Bye. - Yeah."
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"- Laszlo, get the fuck out of here. - Yeah, yeah. I say,"
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"Mr. Sinatra,"
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"forgive me, my mind's a little foggy, but..."
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"last time I looked,"
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"you weren't Chinese."
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"Ring-a-ding-ding."
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"I stand corrected."
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"You guys work with those people? I need that dough."
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"[lock beeps]"
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"Here we go."
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"[chuckles] Okay."
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"$20."
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"$100. What?"
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"This is about $300."
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"- Oh, fucking... - 300 shitting dollars!"
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"My darling, don't explode,"
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"but are you quite sure they're the real Rat Pack"
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"that you met years ago?"
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"What exactly are you trying to say?"
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"Nothing. All good."
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"Hello. I'm in Greece."
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"♪"
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"Aeropuerto-- airport-- can we go to the airport, please?"
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"Thank you."
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"COLIN: Hey."
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"Look at that."
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"You got a couple Koothrappalis,"
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"a Hofstadter, and four Wolowitzes."
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"Oh, and Penny. Not bad."
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"Do you know what I have been wondering, Colin Robinson?"
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"- What's that? - Why do they call it The Big Bang Theory?"
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"It's about the creation of the universe."
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"The what?"
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"And in"
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"a single instant,"
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"my world was turned upside down."
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"...hence the Shaminovich-Cohen conjecture."
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"I-I gave him the broad strokes,"
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"the heliocentric nuts and bolts,"
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"uh, if you will."
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"Has nothing to do with cats, like you thought."
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"But what about the four elephants?"
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"For 750 years,"
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"I believed I knew the truth:"
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"that the Earth rested upon the shoulders"
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"of four mighty elephants..."
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"Forget about the four elephants."
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"...who stood on a shell of a large and noble turtle."
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"Look at the turtle."
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"- Uh-huh. - And then"
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"- four more elephants. -...around which"
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"the sun and the moon and all the stars revolve."
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"COLIN: But now, thanks to modern science,"
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"Nandor understands that we're all just temporary aggregations"
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"of dust and fluid"
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"camping out on a big rock"
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"that's just one of an infinite number"
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"of equally unspecial"
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"big rocks that make up part"
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"of this vast and uncaring universe."
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"This is science."
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"- But this is a turtle. - The world"
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"which I have known for seven and a half centuries..."
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"is a lie."
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"[driver speaking foreign language]"
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"[quietly]: Okay, so we're here at the border,"
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"and he's just talking to the soldier."
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"While he's doing that, I'm gonna go..."
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"Okay."
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"Just gonna get some dirt right here."
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"Just gonna get..."
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"We got to go."
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"NANDOR: Hours pass,"
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"but the cosmic words of Colin Robinson"
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"are still bouncing around my slumberless head."
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"Really makes you think."
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"What's the point of it all?"
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"What does it mean to be a vampire?"
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"I mean, we have no real families."
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"Some of us don't even have girlfriends."
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"Even Sheldon had a girlfriend."
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"But me?"
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"I am all alone,"
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"floating through the cold, dark universe like..."
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"a little grain of furry sand."
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"I got 'em."
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"One, two, three."
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"- I got them al... - Something to drink?"
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"No, thank you!"
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"I'm back! And I brought every--"
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"What happened... here?"
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"I have caused my best human friend Sean"
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"to be on the brink of financial ruin and heartache."
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"We are just like my beloved Rat Pack--"
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"once glorious, now pathetic peasants."
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"NANDOR: And, also, I have never felt"
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"so small, and what is the point of anything?"
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"They won't let me watch my favorite TV show"
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"with the sound up."
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"[inhales, exhales]: Okay."
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"First things first, you need to slumber."
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"- NADJA: Huh? - Here you go. And while you're slumbering,"
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"- I'll think of a plan. - But, first,"
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"scatter the soil around our insignificant bodies."
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"COLIN: No. First, turn up the sound on my fancy casino show."
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"♪"
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"-♪ Roll the dice♪ -[snoring]"
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"♪ Spin that wheel♪"
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"♪ Double down on a lucky deal♪"
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"♪ Feel the breeze where♪"
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"♪ The boardwalk meets the shore...♪"
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"Before we get started, should we go around the group,"
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