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Clips from Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015) - Kimmy Goes to College! (S03E03)

"All right, Titus, you good to go?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Like a middle-aged lady sitting on a dryer at a singing laundromat!"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"♪ Israel is behind it all ♪"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"♪ Every Jew got an e-mail that mornin' ♪"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Fantastic. Moving on."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Gordy's got some opinions."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Mm!"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"♪ Milk has an expiration date ♪"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"What, Xan, are you afraid I'm gonna embarrass you"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"in front of your cool new friends?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"break it down."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"♪ Well, you don't need to swear To have a fun rap ♪"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"♪ You know... ♪"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"I was hired by someone named Paige to put some furniture together."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Paige is one of my roommates."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"She's not here right now, thank God."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"The thing she wants you to put together is over there."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Oh, so your roommate's into catapulting, huh?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"My roommates are on the crew team, so they're all big and strong"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"and good friends with each other, which is awesome for me."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"and a bag of chips?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"You know, Xan, I'm applying here."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Wait, seriously?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"You know it's, like, really hard to get in, right?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"And you're the dumbest person I've ever met."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"I'm a stranger. Xan who?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"You guys, I'm your RA. I'm not your mom."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"in your sexual tapestry."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Just never reuse a dental dam or flip it over and use the other side."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Also, uh, we're gonna do a screening of Shrek 3"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"tonight in the student lounge."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"All right."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"I think she bought it."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"I don't want my roommates seeing my stupid former nanny."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"They think I'm some rich brat who got in 'cause of her money."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"How do they know you're rich?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"You didn't notice this building has my name on it?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Voorhees Hall is you!"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"I thought it was named after the guy from that song."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"♪ Voorhees a jolly good pillow Voorhees a jolly good pillow ♪"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"I don't understand this place."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Like, in high school, being rich was cool."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"But here I'm like you."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"'Sup, Your Majesty?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Just polishing my crown."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Yeah, I'm a... I'm Tony Ravioli,"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"why don't you do less talking and focus on your job?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"That's messed up."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Hey, forget about that."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Oh, we already have some pretty epic plans tonight."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"We're gonna throw it down!"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"- Not stopping till we puke. - Nope."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Cool, cool."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Yeah, I don't know what I'm doing tonight."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"- Yeah. - Nice meeting you, Tony."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Likewise."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"♪ Hillary was there ♪"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Love it, Titus."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"with cell phone towers."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"But you and me are smart."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"We replaced all our teeth."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Yeah, no."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"I'm a honey badger from way back."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"The world can fight its wars, do its hashtag protests,"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"and I will still be a tired gay black man living in a sideways tugboat."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"At least today I'm getting paid."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"♪ Fluoride! ♪"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"♪ The Supreme Court ♪"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"♪ The CIA invented AIDS ♪"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"♪ To sell quilts ♪"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"not as many Chins as some people would have you believe."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"I can put up with anything."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Yeah, well, I'm not giving up either."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"I got a lot more to say..."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"and to sing!"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"♪ These are the things That I see in the room ♪"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Your task rabbit has arrived."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"And you played right into my hands,"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"'cause I am allowed to field questions from my constituents,"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Ask me some softball questions."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Okay, it's the bottom of the seventh."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"but her parents are getting a divorce..."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Oh, I knew it as soon as I said it."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"♪ A Sasquatch and a tree ♪"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"♪ And an ancient tomb ♪"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"♪ He's a Muslim Jew! ♪"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"- I put some stank on that one. - Yeah, you did."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Look, Titus, you've sung backup for me on over 40 albums today."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"How would you like to sing lead?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Lead?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"I haven't sung lead vocals since Luther Vandross"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"passed out at that concert and I ran onstage"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"pretending to be a doctor."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Well, there's this one song that's really special to me."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"But you do."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"this is real."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"This song... this is me, man."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Everything I believe in is right here in magenta and white."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"The black cartridge ran out, and I'm no longer welcome at Office Max."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"He's a monster!"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Oh, my God, you bought it!"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Hold your horses, Xan."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Hold them tight."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"- Cherish them. - What?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"in front of your roommates,"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"So I got you a six-pack of lemonade."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"This is hard lemonade."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"It's even more alcoholic than beer."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"- What? - Go, go, go, go!"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"But the mascot's a lemon on a surfboard."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Who's ready to party?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Go, go, go, go!"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"You can't have that here!"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"But the party..."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"you said that you were gonna puke tonight."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Yeah, because we're going so hard on the erg."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Why would we want to get drunk?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"We have practice at five a.m."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"I know the rules don't apply to you, Xan,"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"but maybe check your privilege for once."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
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