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Clips from The Last Man on Earth - You're All Going to Diet (S03E03)

"as an actual mouse figures prominently into this story."
The Last Man on Earth
"Anyway, this mouse... not the lion named Mouse,"
The Last Man on Earth
"but married into a very large family."
The Last Man on Earth
"His name was Tetracles and his wife was Patricia. Now,"
The Last Man on Earth
"Patricia was one of 21 mouse children."
The Last Man on Earth
"all Ds... Dominic..."
The Last Man on Earth
"What's going on?"
The Last Man on Earth
"I have no idea why I'm watching this,"
The Last Man on Earth
"but apparently Tandy is asking Lewis to be his little buddy."
The Last Man on Earth
"And then their mother, she had a brother Terry,"
The Last Man on Earth
"who, uh, died shortly after mousebirth."
The Last Man on Earth
"Anyway, so this story has something to do with, you know,"
The Last Man on Earth
"this mouse and this lion,"
The Last Man on Earth
"and, you know, there's, like,"
The Last Man on Earth
"a-a thorn in a foot. Right?"
The Last Man on Earth
"Uh, long story short..."
The Last Man on Earth
"Lewis, will you be my friend?"
The Last Man on Earth
"Uh..."
The Last Man on Earth
"fine. Yeah."
The Last Man on Earth
"Yes? Really?"
The Last Man on Earth
"He said yes!"
The Last Man on Earth
"Hey, bud, so you want to, uh, chuck around the pigskin?"
The Last Man on Earth
"- All right. - Go out."
The Last Man on Earth
"What are we doing?"
The Last Man on Earth
"You know, I gave it my blessing. Whatever."
The Last Man on Earth
"Oh, back to pass."
The Last Man on Earth
"Oh, little high."
The Last Man on Earth
"Okay, so I think that most of us are aware by now,"
The Last Man on Earth
"but, uh, Melissa has planted a series of land mines"
The Last Man on Earth
"down here on the beach."
The Last Man on Earth
"I put up a warning."
The Last Man on Earth
"Oh..."
The Last Man on Earth
"_"
The Last Man on Earth
"So, basically, I just decided to make the beach"
The Last Man on Earth
"less of a hangout area and more of a protection zone."
The Last Man on Earth
"So, there's a bunch over there."
The Last Man on Earth
"A bunch over there."
The Last Man on Earth
"That area has a few."
The Last Man on Earth
"And then that area is loaded."
The Last Man on Earth
"So... bunch, bunch, few, loaded."
The Last Man on Earth
"Got it. Everybody got it?"
The Last Man on Earth
"Okay, this has gone on long enough."
The Last Man on Earth
"No. I mean, what are we still doing here?"
The Last Man on Earth
"We're down here on the beach,"
The Last Man on Earth
"talking about where the land mines are."
The Last Man on Earth
"No."
The Last Man on Earth
"I am saying, why are we staying here?"
The Last Man on Earth
"This beach is littered with land mines,"
The Last Man on Earth
"a madman knows exactly where we are,"
The Last Man on Earth
"this house is a complete disaster,"
The Last Man on Earth
"I mean, what are we doing?"
The Last Man on Earth
"Nightmare?"
The Last Man on Earth
"If anything, this place is a day-stallion!"
The Last Man on Earth
"Okay, but we can live literally anywhere in the world."
The Last Man on Earth
"Lewis, it might be easy for you to just pack up"
The Last Man on Earth
"and leave, 'cause you just got here, like, five days ago."
The Last Man on Earth
"But we've been here for a long time."
The Last Man on Earth
"We've laughed here. We've cried here."
The Last Man on Earth
"We've fallen in love,"
The Last Man on Earth
"we've experienced the miracle of life"
The Last Man on Earth
"and the pain of sickness. You know?"
The Last Man on Earth
"And somehow,"
The Last Man on Earth
"against all odds, we became a family here."
The Last Man on Earth
"It's gonna take a lot more than a couple friggin' land mines"
The Last Man on Earth
"I would avoid that area."
The Last Man on Earth
"Shh, shh, shh, shh."
The Last Man on Earth
"It's nothing."
The Last Man on Earth
"- Sorry. - Oh, geez."
The Last Man on Earth
"I'm gonna turn in."
The Last Man on Earth
"Tandy!"
The Last Man on Earth
"Oh, my God!"
The Last Man on Earth
"What is happening?!"
The Last Man on Earth
"It's got to be Pat!"
The Last Man on Earth
"Oh, relax, it's not Pat!"
The Last Man on Earth
"Then who the hell is setting off those land mines?!"
The Last Man on Earth
"I don't know!"
The Last Man on Earth
"What are we gonna do?"
The Last Man on Earth
"Hey!"
The Last Man on Earth
"No!"
The Last Man on Earth
"I don't know anymore!"
The Last Man on Earth
"Who is shooting at us?"
The Last Man on Earth
"It's Melissa! She's not shooting at us!"
The Last Man on Earth
"Then who is she shooting at?"
The Last Man on Earth
"She doesn't know! She's shooting at random!"
The Last Man on Earth
"Oh, my God, we're all gonna die, aren't we?"
The Last Man on Earth
"Listen!"
The Last Man on Earth
"The tide came in, it triggered the land mines,"
The Last Man on Earth
"the vibrations from the land mines"
The Last Man on Earth
"triggered the car alarms! That's all!"
The Last Man on Earth
"Okay, see? I told you we're fine!"
The Last Man on Earth
"My bad! I was laying some blanket fire,"
The Last Man on Earth
"and one got away from me."
The Last Man on Earth
"I can't live like this anymore!"
The Last Man on Earth
"Look, admittedly, we're working out the kinks."
The Last Man on Earth
"But we'll get a handle on this!"
The Last Man on Earth
"No, I'm with Gail! It is not worth it!"
The Last Man on Earth
"Tandy, this is no way to live, man!"
The Last Man on Earth
"Guys, come on! There's nothing to fear but fear itself!"
The Last Man on Earth
"Did we learn nothing from Tony Robbins?"
The Last Man on Earth
"I'm leaving tomorrow!"
The Last Man on Earth
"Anyone who wants is welcome to join me."
The Last Man on Earth
"Count me in."
The Last Man on Earth
"Tandy, we should go with them."
The Last Man on Earth
"We can't just give up!"
The Last Man on Earth
"This is our home!"
The Last Man on Earth
"we're friends, right?"
The Last Man on Earth
"You know that story you were telling me"
The Last Man on Earth
"about the lion and the mouse?"
The Last Man on Earth
"Well, it ends with the mouse pulling the thorn"
The Last Man on Earth
"out of the lion's foot."
The Last Man on Earth
"but I think maybe it's time"
The Last Man on Earth
"to pull the thorn out of the foot."
The Last Man on Earth
"- ♪ Jeremiah was a bullfrog... ♪ - Good-bye, Billy."
The Last Man on Earth
"- ♪ Jeremiah was a bullfrog... ♪ - Good-bye, Billy."
The Last Man on Earth
"- ♪ Jeremiah was a bullfrog... ♪ - Good-bye, Billy."
The Last Man on Earth
"the answer to this, but I got to ask."
The Last Man on Earth
"Can we bring Cher?"
The Last Man on Earth
"No, right?"
The Last Man on Earth
"♪ Jeremiah was a bullfrog ♪"
The Last Man on Earth
"♪ Was a good friend of mine ♪"
The Last Man on Earth
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